"Now," said Bentham T. Tassifer, with an air of defiance, "we'll see!"
He was a bandy-legged little man, whose abdominal structure suggested a
concealed melon.
Red-faced and perspiring, he arose from where he had been teeing up
his ball for the fifth hole, flourished his driver aggressively,
and, adjusting his knobby calves at a carefully calculated angle,
went through a variety of extraordinary contortions with his wrists
and forearms. Outwardly, he was the personification of pugnacious
assurance. He had every appearance of being absolutely certain of his
ability to swat that small white sphere to a distance of not less than
three hundred yards and plumb onto the next green. Inwardly, however,
Bentham had no confidence in himself at all. He knew that the chances
were just nineteen out of twenty that he would slice into the bushes
at about sixty yards and lose a brand new "baby bramble." But, as
befitted a deputy assistant solicitor at the Department of Justice,
he allowed no hint of nervousness to betray itself, looked sternly at
Judson, his lank opponent, and remarked again, "Now we'll see!"
Nobody but Mrs. Tassifer knew what a sucking dove Bentham really was in
his inmost soul. The world at large regarded him as a rather terrible
squatty person who had a chip on each shoulder, for he made almost
as much noise insisting on his rights as a native Briton. In point
of fact, he thought he looked like Stephen A. Douglas or, in lieu
of that, like Robert G. Ingersoll possibly. But that was all on the
exterior. And now, as he addressed the ball, he kept inwardly repeating
to himself: "Eye on the ball--head steady--follow through. Eye on the
ball--head steady--follow through." Then, summoning all his resources,
he swung his driver over his shoulder and was about to bring it down
with the impetus of a Travis, when he thought he saw a black gnat
dancing in front of his eyes.
"Tush!" he exclaimed, waving with his left hand. "These flies!"
"Aren't any flies," retorted his friend Judson, from the Department of
Agriculture, "in October."
"Well, I thought there was," said Bentham, dressing at the ball once
more. "There it is again!" he added, suddenly striking at something.
Then he fastened his eyes on the horizon. "You're right! It isn't
here--it's there! See it?" And he pointed out into the blue of space
with his driver.
"Flying machine," announced Judson. "Watch it go!"
The black speck was coming swiftly toward them and growing larger every
instant.
"It's like a doughnut--round with a hole in the middle!" cried Bentham.
"I believe that fellow intends to land here. What impudence!"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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