"I'm makin' a house," Bobby said. There were still harsh lights in his
placid eyes. They made her ashamed and glad that she was his mother. Her
heart beat very fast and, escaping from an emotion which perplexed and
disturbed her, she threw her arms about him and buried her face against
his cool ear and his moist, cool cheek. "Oh, you love me! You love me! I
know you love me!" she crooned, rocking him against her. "You love me as
well as you do Papa, I know you do."
Bobby wriggled. "Don't love Papa!" he said.
"But you must! You know you must." There was a sob in Winnie's voice.
She was sick, she said to herself. That was why she wanted to be loved.
"'Don't love Papa!' You must love Papa, but love Mamma, too! Oh, Bobby,
poor Mamma!" Bobby tried to pull away again, but she had felt some one
looking at them and she would not let him go. Bobby's breath was warm on
her half bare breast.
She turned her head, guilty, and ready to cry with hatred of her guilt.
Laurence was in the doorway. She knew he had hesitated there, but when
she looked at him he walked straight forward past her with the air of
having only just arrived.
"Hello," he said. "Glad you are up."
"Look what Bobby's done." She let Bobby go.
"Into mischief as usual, eh?" Laurence said. He walked to the wardrobe
and hung up his hat. He had a short, bulky figure, the head and
shoulders too big for the rest of him. He had thick brown hair, coarse
and very slightly sprinkled with gray. His skin was ruddy but did not
look fresh. As he walked with his swaying, awkward stride, he held his
head forward and a little to one side. His coat sagged on the hips and
was caught up toward the back seam. His hands did not appear to belong
to him. They were short, disproportionately small, and very delicate.
"Bobby, you should be made to clean up," Winnie said.
Laurence came over and looked at the pile of dirt. "May----" was all
Bobby said. He wanted to get away from his father. He ran out.
"He's made a mess, all right. Can I help you up?" Laurence leaned to her
and she gave him her weak hands. She wanted him to feel them weak in
his. His mouth twitched a little as he pulled her to her feet. She hated
the furtive bitterness that was in all he did for her, yet it struck a
self-righteous fire from her. She leaned against him. She was frail and
plaintive. He seemed to stiffen against her softness. She loved herself
wistfully, her eyes lifted to his face.
To marry her he had given up the prospect of a career in science. An
expedition to Africa with one of his old professors had been abandoned.
At that time he had finished college and was working for a scientific
degree. She was eighteen.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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