will be greeted by him with cheerful farewells; and so does the force
of suggestion act, till the central figure himself plays his part in
the scene, of which he feels himself the controller and director, and
climbs to bed. But if there has been a hitch anywhere, if the bugbear
of negativism has appeared, if he has been scolded or coaxed or
repressed too much and there have been tears and struggles, then going
to bed is a poor preparation for instant and quiet sleep.
With excitable, highly-strung children, the best laid plans and the
most tactful nurse will not always succeed, and to place him in his
cot is to provoke a storm of angry refusal and resistance. There are
mothers who believe that the best way is then to turn out the light
and leave the child to cry himself to sleep. This is a point on which
no one can lay down rules which are applicable for all children. It
may sometimes succeed, and the child may reason correctly and in the
way we wish him to reason, deciding that the game is not worth the
candle and so give it up. But with nervous, highly-strung children I
doubt if this Spartan conduct is commonly successful. Often if the
attempt is made, the troubled mother, listening to all these
heart-breaking sobs, can bear it no longer, and goes back to the side
of the cot to soothe and persuade him. Then certainly the longer she
has restrained her natural inclination, the longer the child has
sobbed himself into a pitiful little ball of perspiration and tears,
the more difficult will be her task in quieting him, the stronger will
be the impression formed on the child's mind, and the greater will be
the suggestion which will act under the same circumstances to-morrow.
Children who fall a prey to this uncontrolled crying, cry on because
they cannot stop when they have begun. They do not then cry purposely
or with a fixed intention, desiring to attain some object. They cry
because their minds are not at rest, but are irritated and overwrought
by the happenings of the day. We decided that it was useless to
attempt by exhortations at meal-times to induce a nervous child to eat
who habitually refuses food, and that we can only cure the condition
by eliminating from his daily life the elements of repression and
opposition which provoke the counter-opposition. And we must seek the
same solution in this other difficulty of the refusal of sleep. It is
useless to attempt to treat the symptom of refusal of sleep and to
leave the cause of that symptom still constantly in action.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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