The New WardenRitchie, David G. (David George), Mrs.
General
The New Warden
Ritchie, David G. (David George), Mrs.
English fiction; Love stories; Mate selection -- Fiction; University of Oxford -- Fiction
She was there, waiting for him to show her what sort of sympathy he
needed. He did not speak. He came round to the side of the bed where she
was lying, by the windows. There he stood for a moment looking down upon
her. She did not look up. She looked, indeed, like a culprit, like one
humbled, who longed for pardon but did not like to ask for it. And it
was this profound humble sympathy that smote his heart through and
through. What if anything had happened to this dear sister of his? What
if her unhappiness had been too great a strain upon her?
He knelt down by the bed and laid his face on her shoulder, just as he
used to do when he was a child. Neither of them spoke. She moved her
hand and clasped his arm that he placed over her, and they remained like
this for some minutes, while a great peace enclosed them. In those few
minutes it seemed as if years dropped away from them and they were young
again. She the motherly young woman, and he the motherless boy to whom
she stood as mother. All the interval was forgotten and there they were
still, mother and son.
When at last he raised himself he found that her eyes were dim with
tears. As to himself, he felt strangely quieted and composed. He pulled
a chair to the bedside and sat down, not facing her, but sideways, and
he rested his elbow on the edge of her pillow his other hand resting on
hers.
"Did you get through all you wanted to, in Town?" she asked, smiling
through her tears.
"Lena!" he said in a low voice, "you want to spare me. You always do."
His voice overwhelmed her. His humility pierced her like a sword.
"It was all my fault, dear," she began; "entirely my fault."
"No," he said, in a low emphatic voice.
"It was." She reiterated this with almost a sullen persistence.
"How could it possibly be your fault?" he said, with deep self-reproach.
"It was," she said, "though I cannot make you understand it. Jim, you
must forget it all, for my sake. You must forget it at once, you have
things to do."
"I have things to do," he said. "I seemed in danger of forgetting those
things," he said huskily. "As to forgetting, that is a difficult
matter."
"You must put it aside," she said, and now she raised herself on her
pillows and stared anxiously into his face. "You made a mistake such as
the best man _would_ make," she argued passionately. "How can a strong
man suspect weakness in others? You know how it is, we suspect in others
virtues and vices that we have ourselves. You know what I mean, dear. A
drunkard always suspects other men of wanting to drink!" and she laughed
a little, and her voice trembled with an excitement she found it
difficult to suppress. "Thieves always suspect others of thieving. An
amorous man sees sex motives in everything. Do you suppose an honourable
man doesn't also suspect others of honourable intentions?"
He made no reply.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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