The Observations of HenryJerome, Jerome K. (Jerome Klapka)
General
The Observations of Henry
Jerome, Jerome K. (Jerome Klapka)
England -- Social life and customs -- Fiction
"'Enery," he replied to me, without so much as turning a hair, "I'm
afraid you're forgetting your position. When I'm on the kerb shouting
'Speshul!' and you comes to me with yer 'a'penny in yer 'and, you're
master an' I'm man. When I comes into your shop to order refreshments,
and to pay for 'em, I'm boss. Savey? You can bring me a rasher and two
eggs, and see that they're this season's. The lidy will have a
full-sized haddick and a cocoa."
Well, there was justice in what he said. He always did have sense, and I
took his order. You don't often see anybody put it away like that girl
did. I took it she hadn't had a square meal for many a long day. She
polished off a ninepenny haddick, skin and all, and after that she had
two penny rashers, with six slices of bread and butter--"doorsteps," as
we used to call them--and two half pints of cocoa, which is a meal in
itself the way we used to make it. "Kipper" must have had a bit of luck
that day. He couldn't have urged her on more had it been a free feed.
"'Ave an egg," he suggested, the moment the rashers had disappeared. "One
of these eggs will just about finish yer."
"I don't really think as I can," says she, after considering like.
"Well, you know your own strength," he answers. "Perhaps you're best
without it. Speshully if yer not used to 'igh living."
I was glad to see them finish, 'cause I was beginning to get a bit
nervous about the coin, but he paid up right enough, and giv me a
ha'penny for myself.
That was the first time I ever waited upon those two, but it wasn't to be
the last by many a long chalk, as you'll see. He often used to bring her
in after that. Who she was and what she was he didn't know, and she
didn't know, so there was a pair of them. She'd run away from an old
woman down Limehouse way, who used to beat her. That was all she could
tell him. He got her a lodging with an old woman, who had an attic in
the same house where he slept--when it would run to that--taught her to
yell "Speshul!" and found a corner for her. There ain't room for boys
and girls in the Mile-End Road. They're either kids down there or
they're grown-ups. "Kipper" and "Carrots"--as we named her--looked upon
themselves as sweethearts, though he couldn't have been more than
fifteen, and she barely twelve; and that he was regular gone on her
anyone could see with half an eye. Not that he was soft about it--that
wasn't his style. He kept her in order, and she had just to mind, which
I guess was a good thing for her, and when she wanted it he'd use his
hand on her, and make no bones about it. That's the way among that
class. They up and give the old woman a friendly clump, just as you or
me would swear at the missus, or fling a boot-jack at her. They don't
mean anything more.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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