"Well," said Edward Henry, "I should like to meet an architect who had
thoroughly got it into his head that when people pay for seats to see a
play they want to be able to _see_ it, and not just get a look at it now
and then over other people’s heads and round corners of boxes and
things. In most theatres that I’ve been in, the architects seemed to
think that iron pillars and wooden heads are transparent. Either that,
or the architects were rascals. Same with hearing. The pit costs half a
crown, and you don’t pay half a crown to hear glasses rattled in a bar,
or motor-omnibuses rushing down the street. I was never yet in a London
theatre where the architect had really understood that what the people
in the pit wanted to hear was the play, and nothing but the play."
"You’re rather hard on us," said Mr. Alloyd.
"Not so hard as you are on _us_!" said Edward Henry. "And then
draughts! I suppose you think a draught on the back of the neck is good
for us! ... But of course you’ll say all this has nothing to do with
architecture!"
"Oh, no, I sha’n’t! Oh, no, I sha’n’t!" exclaimed Mr. Alloyd. "I quite
agree with you!"
"You _do_?"
"Certainly. You seem to be interested in theatres?"
"I am a bit."
"You come from the North?"
"No, I don’t," said Edward Henry. Mr. Alloyd had no right to be aware
that he was not a Londoner.
"I beg your pardon."
"I come from the Midlands."
"Oh! ... Have you seen the Russian ballet?"
Edward Henry had not, nor heard of it. "Why?" he asked.
"Nothing," said Mr. Alloyd. "Only I saw it the night before last in
Paris. You never saw such dancing. It’s enchanted--enchanted! The
most lovely thing I ever saw in my life. I couldn’t sleep for it. Not
that I ever sleep very well! I merely thought, as you were interested
in theatres--and Midland people are so enterprising! ... Have a
cigarette?"
Edward Henry, who had begun to feel sympathetic, was somewhat repelled
by these odd last remarks. After all the man, though human enough, was
an utter stranger.
"No, thanks," he said. "And so you’re going to put up a church here?"
"Yes."
"Well, I wonder whether you are."
He walked abruptly away under Alloyd’s riddling stare, and he could
almost hear the man saying, "Well, he’s a queer lot, if you like."
At the corner of the site, below the spot where his electric sign was to
have been, he was stopped by a well-dressed middle aged lady who bore a
bundle of papers.
"Will you buy a paper for the cause?" she suggested in a pleasant,
persuasive tone. "One penny."
He obeyed, and she handed him a small blue-printed periodical of which
the title was, _Azure_, "the Organ of the New Thought Church." He
glanced at it, puzzled, and then at the middle-aged lady.
"Every penny of profit goes to the Church-Building Fund," she said, as
if in defence of her action.
Edward Henry burst out laughing; but it was a nervous, half-hysterical
laugh that he laughed.
II.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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