The old vicarage : $b A novelHubback, Mrs. (Catherine-Anne Austen)
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The old vicarage : $b A novel
Hubback, Mrs. (Catherine-Anne Austen)
English fiction -- 19th century
Who could have guessed from Hilary’s calm brow, and sweet smile, and
steady voice, as she waited on, and read, or sung to her husband, that
she had the smallest foresight of the inevitable end? She seemed so
cheerful, so even happy while thus employed! and she was happy too.
Every day during which her precious charge was spared her, every hour
that she was permitted to spend by his side, every sentence of hopeful
aspiration, or gentle courage, which dropped from his lips, was
received as a heaven-sent boon, a favor, as unexpected as it was
precious.
“I almost think you like to have me ill,” said he, smilingly, one day
to her, “you take such delight in nursing me.”
“Can I ever be thankful enough that you are _here_?” was her reply;
“think what it would have been had your illness prevented you from
leaving Halifax. Had you been lingering there in the hospital.”
“Or buried under those walls, which I so narrowly escaped, Hilary.”
She shuddered, and then added,
“Or had I not been your wife; oh, how thankful I am every time I think
of that; how glad I am we married when we did.”
“Are you Hilary? _I_ ought to be, I know; but _you_! I sometimes think
that it was a cruel and selfish precaution on my part; I reproach
myself for having bound you to one, who, instead of being a protector
and support, is but a useless clog, a heavy burden, a sad incumbrance
upon you.”
“Ah! don’t talk so.”
“And sometimes, when I have felt a little stronger, and thought that
perhaps I might linger on for months or years, chained to this couch,
and making you a prisoner too, wearing out the best portion of your
life in this dull slavery, I have been tempted to repine, and wish the
deed undone which united us; I have longed to give you liberty again!
you might be happy but for me, Hilary!”
“What have I done, or said, or looked, or left undone, that you should
speak so, dearest? Could I be happy otherwise? or is there any thing
in this wide world which I could prefer to being near you, at least,
while I can be of any comfort or use?”
“I know there is not, love,” fondly stroking the head which was
nestled on his shoulder; “I know it, and I thank you every hour of the
day for the ineffable tenderness which makes me so happy. But, Hilary,
you always make a pleasure of your duty, it is your nature to throw
your whole soul into your pursuits, to do your very utmost in what you
feel to be right. It is this which impels you now, which makes you my
good angel, my too-devoted nurse. But were you not my wife, as I
should have had no claim, so you would have felt less inclination for
a task, whose charm to you is, I believe, that it is your duty.”
She gazed at him with her soft, loving eyes; put back the black curls
from his temples, and then answered, quietly,
“You know better than that; you know it is something more than duty
which influences me. A hired nurse might be actuated by duty; _my_
motive is beyond, above that.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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