After six weeks of exciting labor and solicitude,
during which his sleep and his rations were always delayed till
exhaustion overpowered him, and then cut down below half the normal
standard, he wakes one morning from a slumber heavy as death into a
state of the most awful vigilance his mind can conceive of. He even
doubts for some moments whether he shall ever sleep again, and in the
agony of that strange, wild suspicion, a cold sweat breaks out over
him from head to foot. Waking from the most utter unconsciousness
possible to a wide-awake state like having the top of one's skull
suddenly lifted off by some surgeon Asmodeus, and the noonday sun
poured into every cranny of his brain, he suffers a shock compared
with which any galvanic battery, not fatal, gives but a gentle
tap. The suddenness of the transition--no gentle fading out of
half-remembered dreams, no slow lifting of lids, no pleasant
uncertainty of time and place gradually replacing itself by dawning
outlines of familiar chair and window frame and cornice--the leap from
absolute nonentity into a glaring, staring world--for a moment almost
unsettles Mr. Edgerton's reason. Then the fear for his sanity passes
and a strange horror of approaching death takes its room. His pulse at
the instant of waking throbs like a trip-hammer; an instant more and
it intermits. Then it begins again at the old pace. He snatches up his
watch from the bureau with a trembling hand and counts--the beat is
130 a minute. Again it stops; again it begins; but now little by
little growing faster and threadier until it runs so swiftly yet so
thinly as to feel under his finger like some continuous strand of
gossamer drawn through the artery. His feet and hands grow deadly
cold. He seems to feel his blood trickling feebly back to his heart
from every portion of his body. He catches a hurried look at the
glass--he sees a dreadful spectre with bistre rings around the
eyelids, an ashen face, leaden lips, and great, mournful, hollow,
desolate eyes. Then his pulse stops altogether; his lungs cease their
involuntary action; and with a sense of inconceivable terror
paralyzing the very effort he now feels it vital to make, he puts them
under voluntary control and makes each separate inspiration by an
effort as conscious as working a bellows. I doubt not that many men
have died just at this place through absolute lack of will to continue
such effort. Then the metaphorical paralysis of fear is seconded by
the simulation of a literal one, extending through the limbs of one
side or both; the sufferer reels, feeling one foot fail him--tries to
revolve one arm like a windmill, that he may restore his circulation,
and that arm for some instants hangs powerless. Presently, with one
tremendous concentration of will, his brain shouts down an order to
the rebellious member--it stirs with sullen reluctance--it moves an
inch--and then it breaks from the prison of its waking nightmare.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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