The Ordeal by Fire: By a Sergeant in the French Army — John Shaqi
The Ordeal by Fire: By a Sergeant in the French ArmyBerger, Marcel
General
The Ordeal by Fire: By a Sergeant in the French Army
Berger, Marcel
Soldiers -- Fiction; World War, 1914-1918 -- France -- Fiction
His society, moreover, was not devoid of interest. He had travelled so
much, rubbed up against so many people, seen so many things. Having
entered, at the age of fourteen, a big silk firm managed by one of
his uncles, whose counting houses were to be found all over the
world, he had been successively a sojourner in very varied latitudes,
from Colombo to Boston, from Rio Janeiro to Yokohama. An intelligent
observer, he owed to his wanderings and to his early contact with the
different races of merchants, a dry and caustic turn of mind not unakin
to my own. Thence sprang our speedy understanding, which resembled real
harmony, without either of us feeling much liking or esteem for the
other. As cynics we agreed in our scornful verdicts on others and on
ourselves. I must say that he did not flatter himself that he was in
any way an intellectual. Each time I sketched some generalisation, or
laid the foundations of a system, he escaped me, sneering:
"Oh, that's literature."
Then, irritated, I inwardly dubbed him a "counter-jumper."
"Have you been to see the Landrys off?" he asked abruptly.
"Yes."
"Shall you see them again in Paris?"
"Before that perhaps. They expect to come back here."
"I thought you were going to leave?"
"I don't know now. That will depend!"
He gave a little laugh which annoyed me.
"Oh, so things are getting on?"
"What's getting on?"
"Your schemes."
"What schemes?"
"To do with the girl of course."
I did not deign to seem vexed, and put on a joking tone.
"My dear fellow, after all I've said to you on that subject!"
"It's possible to change one's mind."
"No. It would never even enter my head to change my mind about that."
I summed up, in a few words, one of my favourite theses: marriage in
our state of civilisation is an absurdity; it would be ridiculous to
chain oneself for the rest of one's life to a woman--and such a woman,
a girl, a creature still in germ, who had revealed nothing of her
secret. It would certainly need an artlessness to which I was no longer
susceptible, or a faculty for enthusiasm still more extinct in me.
Each time a friend told me of his happy engagement I gazed at him in
astonishment as at a being fallen from another planet. I concluded:
"This little Landry girl is right enough to flirt with in the holidays!
She's not displeasing or stupid, but I beg you to believe that there is
nothing, and never will be anything between us...."
Had I convinced him? He continued after a moment's silence.
"They say ... she's well off!"
"That doesn't tempt me either."
He protested:
"My dear chap, you're very much like the rest of the world!"
I shrugged my shoulders and assured him that I was perfectly happy.
"No ambitions?"
"None."
At his look of unbelief I set myself to sing the praises of the
dilettante's life I was leading. Some question he asked led me to go
into certain details to illustrate the way in which everything had
always gone well with me.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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