The speaker said: "How are you, old boots? (A voice: '_Thank you for your compliment._') We're the boys to give the Rebels comfort and cheers. (A voice: '_We are here to-night to stand by the Constitution!_') What's old Abe about? Locking up good Democrats in Fort Lafayette! Well; it's our own fault, you know; we deserve worse treatment and hisses. (A voice: '_We abhor these Rebels as much as the Black Republicans!_') We can give the Rebels what they want and applause. (A voice: '_But we also hate home tyranny!_' '_Why was the idolized General of the Mackerel Brigade removed?_') To please the Rebels we have licked the Black Republicans in New York; we've done the Rebels good. (A voice: '_To spite us, that's so, boys!_') And we'll make them love us yet! The New York election tickles them, and cheers. (A voice: '_Whose good was he removed for?_') For Jeff Davis three cheers, boys, and great enthusiasm. (A voice: '_Let history show!_') We'll make him President in 1864! (A voice: '_Good night!_')" You see, my boy, this horrible twistification was the result of the reporter's getting confused about who was the speaker--him on the hotel balcony or the talkative chaps in the street. If our excellent national Democratic Organization would have less talking during their public speeches, my boy, there need be no such inhuman mistakes as that which has calumniated and utterly prostrated the Venerable Gammon. On Wednesday I took a trot on the war-path upon the architectural street, Pegasus, and found the veteran Mackerel Brigade back at Paris again. They had made a great march from the Blue Ridge, my boy, and when I reached the front I found a scientific chap from Cincinnati taking observations. He stuck a tall stick into the ground, and scratched a long line on the damp sod, from the foot of this stick to the extreme right of the spectacled Brigade, letting the toes of the front rank of the Mackerels just touch it. Then he attached a powerful magnifying-glass to about the centre of the upright stick, and commenced looking through it very intently all along the line he had drawn. I observed him attentively, and says I: "What is the nature of your contract with the Government, my serious friend?" He rubbed the glass with his blue silk pocket-handkerchief, and says he: "I have invented this useful arrangement to ascertain whether or not the Army of Accomac is really advancing. I closely watch the line to which the toes of the front rank of the army are already very near, and could almost swear that the forward movement is still going on. The average speed of this army," says the scientific chap, calculatingly, "has hitherto been six miles in six weeks; but now that the war is about to commence in earnest, I think that the troops are making better time."