The Paris Sketch Book of Mr. M. A. Titmarsh — John Shaqi
The Paris Sketch Book of Mr. M. A. TitmarshThackeray, William Makepeace
General
The Paris Sketch Book of Mr. M. A. Titmarsh
Thackeray, William Makepeace
Paris (France) -- Description and travel
About twelve o’clock, just as the bell of the packet is tolling a
farewell to London Bridge, and warning off the blackguard-boys with the
newspapers, who have been shoving Times, Herald, Penny Paul-Pry, Penny
Satirist, Flare-up, and other abominations, into your face—just as the
bell has tolled, and the Jews, strangers, people-taking-leave-of their
families, and blackguard-boys aforesaid, are making a rush for the
narrow plank which conducts from the paddle-box of the “Emerald”
steamboat unto the quay—you perceive, staggering down Thames Street,
those two hackney-coaches, for the arrival of which you have been
praying, trembling, hoping, despairing, swearing—sw—, I beg your
pardon, I believe the word is not used in polite company—and
transpiring, for the last half-hour. Yes, at last, the two coaches draw
near, and from thence an awful number of trunks, children, carpet-bags,
nursery-maids, hat-boxes, band-boxes, bonnet-boxes, desks, cloaks, and
an affectionate wife, are discharged on the quay.
“Elizabeth, take care of Miss Jane,” screams that worthy woman, who has
been for a fortnight employed in getting this tremendous body of troops
and baggage into marching order. “Hicks! Hicks! for heaven’s sake mind
the babies!”—“George—Edward, sir, if you go near that porter with the
trunk, he will tumble down and kill you, you naughty boy!—My love, DO
take the cloaks and umbrellas, and give a hand to Fanny and Lucy; and I
wish you would speak to the hackney-coachmen, dear, they want fifteen
shillings, and count the packages, love—twenty-seven packages,—and
bring little Flo; where’s little Flo?—Flo! Flo!”—(Flo comes sneaking
in; she has been speaking a few parting words to a one-eyed terrier,
that sneaks off similarly, landward.)
As when the hawk menaces the hen-roost, in like manner, when such a
danger as a voyage menaces a mother, she becomes suddenly endowed with
a ferocious presence of mind, and bristling up and screaming in the
front of her brood, and in the face of circumstances, succeeds, by her
courage, in putting her enemy to flight; in like manner you will
always, I think, find your wife (if that lady be good for twopence)
shrill, eager, and ill-humored, before, and during a great family move
of this nature. Well, the swindling hackney-coachmen are paid, the
mother leading on her regiment of little ones, and supported by her
auxiliary nurse-maids, are safe in the cabin;—you have counted
twenty-six of the twenty-seven parcels, and have them on board, and
that horrid man on the paddle-box, who, for twenty minutes past, has
been roaring out, NOW, SIR!—says, NOW, SIR, no more.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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