England -- Social life and customs -- 18th century -- Fiction; Health resorts -- Fiction
"On Sunday," the Beau resumed with his old suavity of enunciation, "the
waters will not be drunk until the fulfilment of Divine Service. On
Monday the usual Assembly will be held, and a Cotillon will be danced at
twelve o'clock precisely. Chairs at half-past twelve o'clock precisely.
And now, my lords, ladies and gentlemen, nothing remains for me but to
wish you a vastly enjoyable breakfast, a happy issue from your divers
infirmities and a very good morning."
This benediction was the recognized sign of dismissal; the Beau
descended from his pedestal and the Exquisite Mob betook itself down
hill, although a few individuals waited behind in order to consult with
the former on matters of etiquette, fashion and gentility, his advice
being considered the most refined in the country.
Mrs. Courteen sailed down upon Mr. Ripple and asked whether she was
right in thinking that the moment when green should be worn was arrived.
"I think so, ma'am," the Beau assured her. "I think so: to be sure, a
few of our more conservative fops hold that green should never appear
before the Queen's birthday. But I differ from them, ma'am, I differ.
You will observe madam, that I differ."
Phyllida had rejoined her mother by this time, and Mr. Ripple saluted
her freshness with a courtly bow.
"Many Valentines?" he inquired with a quizzical droop of his left
eyelid.
Phyllida blushed, protesting,
"No, indeed, sir."
The Widow hastily assured Mr. Ripple that her daughter was not near old
enough to dream of such follies, while Major Tarry and Mr. Moon, whose
skirts were stiff with Valentines intended for Mrs. Courteen herself,
looked very severely at the sun as if he were in some way responsible
for the madness of love in the air.
"Tut-tut! Youth's the time for love, as Mr. Gay sings, and though I do
not encourage the interchange of passionate sentiments among those who
are seeking to recover their health, I regard St. Valentine's Day as a
very proper festival for young men and maidens in whose hearts no
degeneration is yet apparent." With these words Mr. Ripple drooped his
left eyelid lower than ever.
"Fie! sir, we shall have the child vapoured like any woman of fashion,
if you put such inflammable ideas into her head," complained Mrs.
Courteen, who was just beginning to be more than a little jealous of her
daughter.
"Not at all, ma'am," said the Beau, "I swear I saw an agreeable spark
toast Miss Phyllida in Chalybeate--the irreverent dog--but I forgave
him; upon my honour, I was near doing the same thing myself."
Now Phyllida was not at all anxious for her mother to think she had an
admirer, and yet with youth's vanity, she could not resist a
half-acknowledgment of the Beau's rally. Luckily for her, Major Tarry,
who always resented his removal from the centre of attraction, thought
it was time to assert his existence by demanding rather pompously if the
Beau saw anything unusual in the sky.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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