England -- Fiction; Marriage -- Fiction; Teachers -- Fiction
At dinner, before the ordeal, the Masters in the Common-Room had given
Speed jocular advice. "Whatever you do, watch that they don't get near
the electric-light switches," said Clanwell. Pritchard said: "When old
Blenkinsop took his first prep they switched off the lights and then
took his trousers off and poured ink over his legs." Garforth said:
"Whatever you do, don't lose your temper and hit anybody. It doesn't
pay." "Best to walk up and down the rows if you want them to stop
talking," said Ransome. Pritchard said: "If you do that they'll beat
time to your steps with their feet." Poulet remarked reminiscently:
"When I took my first prep they started a gramophone somewhere, and I
guessed they'd hidden it well, so I said: 'Gentlemen, anyone who
interrupts the music will have a hundred lines!' They laughed and were
quite peaceable afterwards."
Speed said, at the conclusion of the meal: "I'm much obliged to
everybody for the advice. I'll try to remember all of it, but I guess
when I'm in there I shall just do whatever occurs to me at the moment."
To which Clanwell replied, putting a hand on Speed's shoulder: "You
couldn't do better, my lad."
Speed was very nervous as he took his seat on the dais at five to seven
and watched the school straggling to their places. They came in quietly
enough, but there was an atmosphere of subdued expectancy of which Speed
was keenly conscious; the boys stared about them, grinned at each other,
seemed as if they were waiting for something to happen. Nevertheless, at
five past seven all was perfectly quiet and orderly, although it was
obvious that little work was being done. Speed felt rather as if he were
sitting on a powder-magazine, and there was a sense in which he was
eager for the storm to break.
At about a quarter-past seven a banging of desk-lids began at the far end
of the hall.
He stood up and said, quietly, but in a voice that carried well: "I
don't want to be hard on anybody, so I'd better warn you that I shall
punish any disorderliness very severely."
There was some tittering, and for a moment or so he wondered if he had
made a fool of himself.
Then he saw a bright, rather pleasant-faced boy in one of the back rows
deliberately raise a desk-lid and drop it with a bang. Speed consulted
the map of the desks that was in front of him and by counting down the
rows discovered the boy's name to be Worsley. He wondered how the name
should be pronounced--whether the first syllable should rhyme with
"purse" or with "horse." Instinct in him, that uncanny feeling for
atmosphere, embarked him on an outrageously bold adventure, nothing less
than a piece of facetiousness, the most dangerous weapon in a new
Master's armoury, and the one most of all likely to recoil on himself.
He stood up again and said: "Wawsley or Wurssley--however you call
yourself--you have a hundred lines!"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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