Now, the captain did not wish to speak to him, but, forced upon him as it was by the first lieutenant, he could do no less. So Mr. Templemore touched his hat, and stood before the captain, we regret to say, with such a good-humoured, sly, confiding smirk on his countenance, as at once established the proof of the accusation, and the enormity of the offence. 'So, sir,' said Captain Plumbton, stopping in his perambulation, and squaring his shoulders still more, 'I find that you laugh at the first lieutenant.' 'I, sir?' replied the boy, the smirk expanding into a broad grin. 'Yes; you, sir,' said the first lieutenant, now drawing up to his full height; 'why, you're laughing now, sir.' 'I can't help it, sir--it's not my fault; and I'm sure it's not yours, sir,' added the boy demurely. 'Are you aware, Edward--Mr. Templemore, I mean--of the impropriety of disrespect to your superior officer?' 'I never laughed at Mr. Markitall but once, sir, that I can recollect, and that was when he tumbled over the messenger.' 'And why did you laugh at him then, sir?' 'I always do laugh when any one tumbles down,' replied the lad; 'I can't help it, sir.' 'Then, sir, I suppose you would laugh if you saw me rolling in the lee-scuppers?' said the captain. 'Oh!' replied the boy, no longer able to contain himself, 'I'm sure I should burst myself with laughing--I think I see you now, sir.' 'Do you, indeed! I'm very glad that you do not; though I'm afraid, young gentleman, you stand convicted by your own confession.' 'Yes, sir, for laughing, if that is any crime; but it's not in the Articles of War.' 'No, sir; but disrespect is. You laugh when you go to the mast-head.' 'But I obey the order, sir, immediately--do I not, Mr. Markitall?' 'Yes, sir, you obey the order; but, at the same time, your laughing proves that you do not mind the punishment.' 'No more I do, sir. I spend half my time at the mast-head, and I'm used to it now.' 'But, Mr. Templemore, ought you not to feel the disgrace of the punishment?' inquired the captain severely. 'Yes, sir, if I felt I deserved it I should. I should not laugh, sir, if _you_ sent me to the mast-head,' replied the boy, assuming a serious countenance. 'You see, Mr. Markitall, that he can be grave,' observed the captain. 'I've tried all I can to make him so, sir,' replied the first lieutenant; 'but I wish to ask Mr. Templemore what he means to imply by saying, "when he deserves it." Does he mean to say that I have ever punished him unjustly?' 'Yes, sir,' replied the boy boldly; 'five times out of six I am mast-headed for nothing--and that's the reason why I do not mind it.' 'For nothing, sir! Do you call laughing nothing?' 'I pay every attention that I can to my duty, sir; I always obey your orders; I try all I can to make you pleased with me--but you are always punishing me.' 'Yes, sir, for laughing, and, what is worse, making the ship's company laugh.'