The Plattner Story, and OthersWells, H. G. (Herbert George)
Science
The Plattner Story, and Others
Wells, H. G. (Herbert George)
Great Britain -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Science fiction; Short stories, English
So the new convert to _joie de vivre_ emerged upon the passage, his
decorations a little scattered, but that respectable hatful of fungi
still under his arm. He hesitated at the three ways, and decided on the
kitchen. Whereupon Clarence, who was fumbling with the key, gave up
the attempt to imprison his host, and fled into the scullery, only to
be captured before he could open the door into the yard. Mr. Clarence
is singularly reticent of the details of what occurred. It seems that
Mr. Coombes' transitory irritation had vanished again, and he was once
more a genial playfellow. And as there were knives and meat choppers
about, Clarence very generously resolved to humour him and so avoid
anything tragic. It is beyond dispute that Mr. Coombes played with Mr.
Clarence to his heart's content; they could not have been more playful
and familiar if they had known each other for years. He insisted gaily
on Clarence trying the fungi, and after a friendly tussle, was smitten
with remorse at the mess he was making of his guest's face. It also
appears that Clarence was dragged under the sink and his face scrubbed
with the blacking brush,--he being still resolved to humour the lunatic
at any cost,--and that finally, in a somewhat dishevelled, chipped, and
discoloured condition, he was assisted to his coat and shown out by the
back door, the shopway being barred by Jennie. Mr. Coombes' wandering
thoughts then turned to Jennie. Jennie had been unable to unfasten the
shop door, but she shot the bolts against Mr. Coombes' latch-key, and
remained in possession of the shop for the rest of the evening.
It would appear that Mr. Coombes then returned to the kitchen, still
in pursuit of gaiety, and, albeit a strict Good Templar, drank (or
spilt down the front of the first and only frock-coat) no less than
five bottles of the stout Mrs. Coombes insisted upon having for her
health's sake. He made cheerful noises by breaking off the necks of
the bottles with several of his wife's wedding-present dinner-plates,
and during the earlier part of this great drunk he sang divers merry
ballads. He cut his finger rather badly with one of the bottles,--the
only bloodshed in this story,--and what with that, and the systematic
convulsion of his inexperienced physiology by the liquorish brand
of Mrs. Coombes' stout, it may be the evil of the fungus poison was
somehow allayed. But we prefer to draw a veil over the concluding
incidents of this Sunday afternoon. They ended in the coal cellar, in a
deep and healing sleep.
* * * * *
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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