Just then Apollo happened--"Heigh-ho! A sonnet to have made?" Oh, dear me, no!--upon Miss Io (Such is the tale I heard from Clio) The midwife to have played. The boy, as if stamped out of wax, Might Zeus as father fairly tax. He read the letter half asleep, Then started in dismay: "The road is long, and hell is deep, Your rocks I know are rough and steep . . . Yet like a king he'll pay!" He dons his cap of mist and furs, Then through the air the charger spurs. With locks all frizzled a la mode, And ruffles smooth and nice, In gala dress, that brightly glowed (A gift Aurora had bestowed), With watch-chains of high price, With toes turned out, and chapeau bas, He stood before hell's mighty czar. BOOK II. The grumbler, in his usual tone, Received him with a curse: "To Pomerania straight begone! Ugh! how he smells of eau de Cologne! Why, brimstone isn't worse. He'd best be off to heaven again, Or he'll infect hell's wide domain." The god of pills, in sore surprise, A spring then backwards took: "Is this his highness' usual guise? 'Tis in the brain, I see, that lies The mischief--what a look! See how his eyes in frenzy roll! The case is bad, upon my soul! "A journey to Elysium The infectus would dissolve, Making the saps less tough become, As through the Capitolium And stomach they revolve. Provisionally be it so: Let's start then--but incognito!" "Ay, worthy sir, no doubt well meant! If, in these regions hazy, As with you folk, so charged with scent, You dapper ones who heaven frequent, 'Twere proper to be lazy, If hell a master needed not, Why, then I'd follow on the spot! "Ha! if the cat once turned her back, Pray where would be the mice? They'd sally forth from every crack, My very mufti would attack, Spoil all things in a trice! Oddsbodikins! 'tis pretty cool! I'll let him see I'm no such fool! "A pleasant uproar happened erst, When they assailed my tower! No fault of mine 'twas, at the worst, That from their desks and chains to burst Philosophers had power. What, has there e'er escaped a poet? Help, heaven! what misery to know it! "When days are long, folks talk more stuff! Upon your seats, no doubt, With all your cards and music rough, And scribblings too, 'tis hard enough The moments to eke out. Idleness, like a flea will gnaw On velvet cushions,--as on straw. "My brother no attempt omits To drive away ennui; His lightning round about him flits, The target with his storms he hits (Those howls prove that to me), Till Rhea's trembling shoulders ache, And force me e'en for hell to quake.