HUMPHRY. Well, then, isn't I right? What argufies your signifies, or your magnifies? There an't the toss up of a copper between 'um--I wou'dn't give a leather button for the choice, as the old proverb goes. FRANKTON. Harkee, Mr. Talkative, if you ever---- HUMPHRY. No, sir, never,--that I won't--no, no, you may be sure of that. FRANKTON. Sure of what? HUMPHRY. Nothing, sir; we can be sartin of nothing in this world, as Mr. Thumpum says. LOVEYET. Ha, ha, ha. FRANKTON. Oh, what a precious numskull it is! LOVEYET. [_To FRANKTON._] I have a letter here, which announces to my father, my intention to leave the West-Indies the beginning of March, but I miss'd of the expected conveyance--I have half a mind to send it yet. I would not have him apprized of my arrival; for I wish to try if he would know me;--and yet I long to embrace my aged and venerable parent.--Will you do me the favour to take this letter to my father, Mr. Cubb? He lives at number two hundred and fifty, in Queen-Street, in a three-story red brick house.--I'll reward you for it. HUMPHRY. As for your rewards, I'm above it, d' ye see: If I do it, I'll do it without fear or reward, as the saying is; but if you think fit, you may treat a body to the valuation of a mug or so. Don't you love ale? for they says how the Yorkers is cursed fellows for strong beer. LOVEYET. What a digression! HUMPHRY. I scorn your words--'tis no transgression at all to drink ale--Why, Parson Thumpum himself drinks ale. LOVEYET. Well, will you carry the letter? You shall have as much strong beer when you come back as you can stagger under. HUMPHRY. Why, if I was for to have my beer a-board before I go, I shou'dn't get top-heavy, as the saying is; for I can carry as much weight in my head as e'er a he that wears a head, without staggering. FRANKTON. I dare say you can; you have always plenty of that. HUMPHRY. Yes, you're right--I know what you mean; I've got it here a little, as old Mr. Scourge says. [_Exeunt FRANKTON and LOVEYET._] But as for what you said just now--no, no, sir; I'll never foutre you, I warrant you--I always curses and swears in plain English, d' ye see--I--what's he gone? I hope he won't come back again for the sixth time; three times has he been in and out within the circumference of a minute. But I won't stay here no longer--I'll go and try if I can't find out where Doll lives, my old sweetheart; I an't so poor, but what I can buy her a ribbon or so; and, if all comes to all, I can get a new pair o' breeches too; for, to be sure, this one doesn't look quite so decent, and if that doesn't fetch her, the devil shall, as the old saying is. I'm cursedly afraid, I sha'n't be able to find out her quarters. [_Exit._ SCENE III. _MR. FRIENDLY'S House._ _Enter HARRIET and MARIA._ HARRIET. Pray, Maria, how were you entertained at the Assembly last night?