Methodist Church (Great Britain) -- Fiction; World War, 1914-1918 -- Fiction
'No,--no, nothing. Strange, isn't it? Ever since that day when I
found myself a good many miles away from Bombay, and realized that I
was alive, everything stands out plainly in my memory; but before
that,--nothing. I could describe to you in detail almost everything
that has taken place since then. But there seems to be a great, black
wall which hides everything that took place before. I shudder at it
sometimes because it looks so impenetrable. Now and then I have
dreams, the same old dreams of black, evil faces, and flashing knives,
and cries of agony; but they are only dreams,--I remember nothing.'
'During the time you were in England training,' I said, 'you went to
various parts of the country?'
'Yes, I was in Exeter, Swindon, Bramshott, Salisbury Plain.'
'And you recognized none of them, you'd no feeling that you had seen
those places before?'
'No.'
'Faces, now,' I urged; 'do you ever see faces which suggest people you
have known in the past?'
He was silent for two or three seconds.
'Yes, and no,' he replied. 'I see faces sometimes which, while they
don't cause me to remember, give me strange fancies and
incomprehensible longings. Sometimes I hear names which have the same
effect upon me.'
'And your memory has been good for ordinary things?'
He laughed gaily. 'I think that whatever I went through has increased
my powers of memory,--that is, those things that took place since I
woke up. If you will ask the sub., or the drill sergeant who gave me
my training, they will tell you that there was never any need to tell
me anything twice. I forget nothing, I never have to make an effort to
remember. When I hear a thing, or see a man's face, I never forget it.
I worked hard, too. I have read a good deal. I found that I knew
nothing of mathematics, and that my knowledge of German and French was
very hazy. It is not so now. Things like _that_ have come to me in a
miraculous way.'
'Have you tried for a commission?'
'No. I have been offered one, but I wouldn't have it. Something, I
don't know what, told me not to. I wouldn't even have a corporal's
stripe.'
'And you have no more idea of who you really are than you had when I
saw you first?'
'No, not a bit.'
'Let me see if I can help your memory,' I said. 'Devonshire, think of
that word, now, and what it represents,--does it bring back anything to
you?'
'Nothing, except that yearning. I have a feeling that I know something
about it,--a great longing to--to--I hardly know what.'
I tried him a little farther. 'Granitelands,--does that mean anything
to you?'
Again he hesitated. 'No, nothing.'
'Can you ever recall any remembrance of, or has the name of Maurice St.
Mabyn any interest for you?'
I asked this because, even in spite of what Captain Springfield had
told me, vague fancies had come to me that perhaps there might be some
mistake, and--and----but I dared not bring my thoughts to a conclusion.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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