_Peggy._ There, Will! Off in your local color again. I'll bet you the Policeman would have paid Jack's bill himself! _Will (irritably)._ Well, for God's sake, Peggy, what sort of a story would you leave me? Have I got to write cheap cheer-up stuff? _Peggy._ Now don't be cross, dear. _Will._ Well, I know--but---- _Peggy (embraces him)._ Poor dear! He's working so hard and he does get cross with his critics. Hurry up, Bill, and get outside, or he'll snap your head off! Quick! Fly! _Bill (exit to fire-escape)._ Gee! I'm glad I ain't writing a play! _Peggy._ Now, come on. I'm interested in this. Where were we? _Will._ The scene is in the restaurant. Schmidt is on---- _Peggy._ I thought he went off! _Will._ Well, there's no law to prevent his coming back, is there? (_The Play-play begins to appear._) He's grumbling because he thinks Jack will eat too much. (_Full light on Play-play. Peggy and Will make secret exit._) _Schmidt._ I send him by Schnitzelman on der next block! I send him so soon as I find him eating double orders! He haf noddings to eat for two days und he comes by me to make it up! (_Sits at desk, and takes newspaper._) _Bill (enters Center, hesitating)._ Say! _Schmidt._ Vot? _Bill._ Kin I git something to eat here? _Schmidt._ You got any money? _Bill._ Sure I got money. _Schmidt._ Let me see it. _Bill._ Hully gee! Before I eat? _Schmidt._ You get noddings in my place till I see your money! _Bill._ Gee! Since when is this? Here! _(Shows money.)_ _Schmidt._ A nickel? You don't get much fer a nickel! _(Calls.)_ Hey, you! Vaiter! Vy, you don't come for my customers? _Jack (rushes in Left)._ Here! _(Sees Bill.)_ Oh, hello! It's the kid! _Bill._ Whatcher doin' here? _Jack (comes up to him, whispers)._ I got a job! _Bill._ Hully gee! _Jack._ A fine job! No wages--but I'll get my grub every day. _Bill._ Well, I want grub too! I got the stuff! _Jack (excitedly)._ A customer! _(Turns to Schmidt.)_ See, Mr. Schmidt, a customer already! _(Rushes with alacrity to table.)_ Have a seat, sir. Your hat, sir. _(Hangs it up.)_ There, sir. Here's the menu, sir. _Bill._ Say, Cully, whatcher givin' us? _Jack._ Ssh! _(Aloud.)_ What will you have, sir? Sweet bread croquettes, sir? We have delicious sweet-bread croquettes today. Or perhaps you'd like--let me see, sir. _(Snatches menu.)_ Corned beef hash, sir, or possibly a charlotte russe. _Bill._ Say, what the blazes---- _Jack._ Your napkin, sir. Your knife and fork, sir. You'll have a glass of water, of course, sir! _(Rushes for water.)_ There, sir, you'll have bread and butter, sir? _Bill._ I'll have a ham sandwich. _Jack._ Ah! Most wholesome food--ham sandwiches! As quickly as possible, sir. _Bill._ Make it a big one. _Jack (aside)._ You bet I will. _(Hurries Left, gets sandwich and returns.)_ There's your sandwich. Ain't that a lulu? _(To Schmidt.)_ See, Mr. Schmidt! Trade's picking up already. _Schmidt._ Yes, I see--I make my fortune by you.