'Married!' he echoed thoughtfully, and something in his voice arrested
her. 'No, Gwen, my dear, you have never been married. You don't even
understand what it means to be married; for your knowledge of it is all
evil. That's the worst of it. Don't be angry, dear, I'm not going to
lecture like Mrs. Grundy on the sin of a loveless marriage, or the
degradation of one, like the sentimentalists. Surely, surely a man or a
woman may marry from pity, from honour, from self-devotion, and yet
touch the perfection of the tie. But you,'--he paused a while, 'you did
not only lose the love of it, Gwen; the thing itself was never yours.
The facing of life, hand in hand; two of you where there was but one
before. See! there is my hand, Gwen, and there is yours. A difference,
isn't there? But how close they fit, each to each! How close and
warm,'--he paused again to smile at her. 'What is it the song says,
Gwen, about giving your hand where your heart can never be? Fudge! It
should be, "How can I give my heart where my hand can never be?" Yes!
there they are, close, and I am there too, my darling. Ready, always
ready. Never again, Gwen, without the touch of a hand, like--how does
it run?--like children frightened in the night, like children crying
for the light. Never again, Gwen, never again.'
They were sitting together side by side on the sofa, her hand held in
his so lightly that she could have withdrawn it without an effort. But
it lay there in his clasp as she sat listening to the soft voice.
Listening on, even when it ceased, as if its spell lingered. They were
not even looking at each other. Beyond the silent room, through the
open door, the sunshine showed Gwen's bearer cleaning the lamps with a
dirty duster. Not a romantic sight; but it is to be doubted if either
saw it, for their eyes were blinded by the great darkness in which they
found themselves, trustfully, hand in hand.
At last, with a little shiver, she tried to move, but his fingers
closed on hers more firmly.
'Too late, Gwen! Too late. You should have taken it away when you had
the chance,' he said joyously. 'Oh, Gwen, my darling, if we were
married you would forget to be afraid, as you did just now; didn't you,
Gwen?'
'I believe you mesmerise me,' she replied, trying to jest, 'and
forgetting bills doesn't help to pay them; does it, Dan?'
'So you are back at the money again. Well, I don't care. Money or no
money; promotion or no promotion----'
'No! no!' she interrupted, yielding, as she always did, to his
decision, 'that really is not fair--the bargain was promotion--it was
indeed.'
'Promotion be it,' he assented with a contented laugh, 'though I can't
for the life of me see what it has got to do with the matter.'
'You would at least have more pay,' she put in, wondering faintly the
while how it came about that they should be discussing such questions
when she had meant to be so firm. 'I could not marry a pauper; could
I?'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account