Breeder and Sportsman: The old story of the countryman and his deceptive plug was recently repeated in Jersey, where people are supposed to have their eye-teeth cut. It was an old gray pacer this time, attached to a dilapidated wagon by cords and odd ends of harness. The astute hotel proprietor refused to give $20 for the outfit. Owner then replied that he would pace the horse over a good track in three minutes. Landlord bets $100 to $50 that he can't do it. Money was then put up, and owner wanted to draw, as the track was a good way off, and he could not spare the time to attend to the matter. Landlord insisted that the horse must pace or pay forfeit. A sulky and harness were borrowed, and judge placed in the stand, according to Hoyle. Owner claims the right to three trials, according to National Association rules. Point conceded. Old crowbait is scored up and given the word. Works off the mile very slick in 2:43. Landlord feels small, and $100 goes into owner's pocket. Another greenhorn bets $100 that horse can't beat 2:43. Rips off another mile 2:42, and owner pockets the money. Landlord feels better; owner better yet. Latest advices: same old side-wheeler won two or three hundred same way at Flemington, some more at Paterson, and has had a little pacing circuit all to himself. "What fools these mortals be!" * * * * * The following by Richard White in the New York Sun, might very properly have been dedicated to those trichinae-frightened twins, Bismarck and Paul Bert. Sing, heavenly muse, the noble quadruped, Whom Orientals oft presume to scorn, Who glorifies the food that he is fed, Extracting carbon from convenient corn. Peaceful his life, his death almost sublime, His end a grand effect of modern art; Scarce has he bid a sharp adieu to time, When he is packed and ready for the mart. He goes abroad, our land to represent; The earth, from pole to tropic, is his range; He fills the bill for use and ornament, Greases the world, and regulates exchange. Though ministers abroad may lightly treat The rights that only appertain to men, They must protect our Western corn-fed meat, Defending our four-footed citizen. If Bismarck bars our barrels, tubs, or cans, Forcing our pork to make its way incog, Upset his schemes, and overthrow his plans, And clear a pathway for the native hog. * * * * *