The Prince and BettyWodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
General
The Prince and Betty
Wodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
Humorous stories
"What!" he cried.
Mr. Crump nodded gravely.
"You are Prince John of Mervo, and I am here--" he got into his stride
as he reached the familiar phrase--"to inform Your Highness that the
Republic has been dissolved, and that your subjects offer you the
throne of your ancestors."
A horrid doubt seized John.
"You're stringing me. One of those Indians at the _News_, Rupert
Smith, or someone, has put you up to this."
Mr. Crump appeared wounded.
"If Your Highness would glance at these documents-- This is a copy
of the register of the church in which your mother and father were
married."
John glanced at the document. It was perfectly lucid.
"Then--then it's true!" he said.
"Perfectly true, Your Highness. And I am here to inform--"
"But where the deuce is Mervo? I never heard of the place."
"It is an island principality in the Mediterranean, Your High--"
"For goodness' sake, old man, don't keep calling me 'Your Highness.' It
may be fun to you, but it makes me feel a perfect ass. Let me get into
the thing gradually."
Mr. Crump felt in his pocket.
"Mr. Scobell," he said, producing a roll of bills, "entrusted me with
money to defray any expenses--"
More than any words, this spectacle removed any lingering doubt which
John might have had as to the possibility of this being some intricate
practical joke.
"Are these for me?" he said.
Mr. Crump passed them across to him.
"There are a thousand dollars here," he said. "I am also instructed to
say that you are at liberty to draw further against Mr. Scobell's
account at the Wall Street office of the European and Asiatic Bank."
The name Scobell had been recurring like a _leit-motif_ in Mr.
Crump's conversation. This suddenly came home to John.
"Before we go any further," he said, "let's get one thing clear. Who is
this Mr. Scobell? How does he get mixed up in this?"
"He is the proprietor of the Casino at Mervo."
"He seems to be one of those generous, open-handed fellows. Nothing of
the tight wad about him."
"He is deeply interested in Your High--in your return."
John laid the roll of bills beside his coffee cup, and relighted his
cigar.
"That's mighty good of him," he said. "It strikes me, old man, that I
am not absolutely up-to-date as regards the internal affairs of this
important little kingdom of mine. How would it be if you were to put me
next to one or two facts? Start at the beginning and go right on."
When Mr. Crump had finished a condensed history of Mervo and Mervian
politics, John smoked in silence for some minutes.
"Life, Crump," he said at last, "is certainly speeding up as far as I
am concerned. Up till now nothing in particular has ever happened to
me. A couple of days ago I lost my job, was given ten thousand dollars
that I didn't know existed, and now you tell me I'm a prince. Well,
well! These are stirring times. When do we start for the old
homestead?"
"Mr. Scobell was exceedingly anxious that we should return by
Saturday's boat."
"Saturday? What, to-morrow?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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