London (England) -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
no one here (except three or four millions), and the rain drips, drips,
drips, from the trees in the big, dull park, where my people live. I
dare say I oughtn’t to say such things to you, but, as I tell you, I’m
a little mad, and I might as well keep up my character. When one is one
of eight daughters, and there’s very little money (for any of us, at
least), and there’s nothing to do but to go out with three or four
others in a mackintosh, one can easily go off one’s head. Of course
there’s the village, and it’s not at all a nice one, and there are the
people to look after, and heaven knows they’re in want of it; but one
must work with the vicarage, and at the vicarage there are four more
daughters, all old maids, and it’s dreary, and it’s dreadful, and one
has too much of it, and they don’t understand what one thinks or feels,
or a single word one says to them! Besides they _are_ stupid, I
admit—the country poor; they are very, very dense. I like Camberwell
better,” said Lady Aurora, smiling and taking breath, at the end of her
nervous, hurried, almost incoherent speech, of which she had delivered
herself pantingly, with strange intonations and grotesque movements of
her neck, as if she were afraid from one moment to the other that she
would repent, not of her confidence, but of her egotism.
It placed her, for Hyacinth, in an unexpected light, and made him feel
that her awkward, aristocratic spinsterhood was the cover of tumultuous
passions. No one could have less the appearance of being animated by a
vengeful irony; but he saw that this delicate, shy, generous, and
evidently most tender creature was not a person to spare, wherever she
could prick them, the institutions among which she had been brought up
and against which she had violently reacted. Hyacinth had always
supposed that a reactionary meant a backslider from the liberal faith,
but Rosy’s devotee gave a new value to the term; she appeared to have
been driven to her present excesses by the squire and the parson and
the conservative influences of that upper-class British home which our
young man had always supposed to be the highest fruit of civilisation.
It was clear that her ladyship was an original, and an original with
force; but it gave Hyacinth a real pang to hear her make light of
Inglefield (especially the park), and of the opportunities that must
have abounded in Belgrave Square. It had been his belief that in a
world of suffering and injustice these things were, if not the most
righteous, at least the most fascinating. If they didn’t give one the
finest sensations, where were such sensations to be had? He looked at
Lady Aurora with a face which was a tribute to her sudden vividness,
and said, “I can easily understand your wanting to do some good in the
world, because you’re a kind of saint.”
“A very curious kind!” laughed her ladyship.
“But I don’t understand your not liking what your position gives you.”
“I don’t know anything about my position. I want to live!”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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