‘And then my fool of a brother-in-law stuck his oar in, and said, “You ought to have been a giraffe”; and I’m absolutely certain Dora would have said it if he hadn’t got in first. ‘So there it is—the words were all right, but they were used by a man. Still, for some purposes—bankruptcy and things of that kind—a man and his wife count as one, don’t they? What’s the ruling?’ ‘My ruling,’ said Sir Charles, ‘is that your claim fails. It is required that the words should be used by a woman, and your brother-in-law is not a woman.’ ‘Yes, I was afraid you’d think so,’ said Jimmy, ‘but it was worth trying. Anybody want any rotten high collars?’ ‘Now, Mr Pusely-Smythe,’ said the chairman. Mr Pusely-Smythe was a man of middle age, with dark, cavernous eyes and an intellectual forehead. He was pale and thin, and was less solemn than he seemed. ‘I claim to have won,’ he said in a melancholy voice. ‘My method was not the most obvious or direct, and might easily have failed, but the luck was with me. I must tell you that I happen to know a Mrs Magsworth, who of late years has given way a good deal to Nature Study. She haunts the Zoo and the Botanical Gardens. She understands about the habitat of the hyena, and if cockroaches devour their young, and which end of the tree the onion grows—all that kind of thing. She is rather severe with people who, as she phrases it, “show an abysmal ignorance of the simplest facts.” She has got a face like a horse, though that is not germane to the question. I arranged with a kindly hostess to let me take in Mrs Magsworth to dinner one evening—I gather that there was no particular rush for the job. ‘I said: “I’m so glad to meet you again, Mrs Magsworth. With your knowledge you will be able to settle a point that has been worrying me for days. My little nephew asked me which was the tallest animal. And, do you know, I couldn’t be quite sure.” ‘“Then, Mr Smythe,” she said, “you ought to have been. A giraffe is much the tallest of the mammals.” ‘So I claim to have won. She, being a woman ignorant of my intention, was induced to say to me the words required in the order required and without the interpolation of any other word.’ ‘But there’s the interpolation of a full stop,’ said Mr Harding Pope, and was at once called to order—only the chairman has the right to comment and to adjudicate. Sir Charles took a few moments to consider his decision, and then gave his ruling as follows:—