The promotion of the admiral, and other sea comedies — John Shaqi
The promotion of the admiral, and other sea comediesRoberts, Morley
General
The promotion of the admiral, and other sea comedies
Roberts, Morley
English fiction -- 20th century; Sea stories, English; Short stories, English
"Steady!" said Hart; "boys, I'm not clear as to whether we hain't
bein' led hinto a hambush. It hain't nateral for shipwrecked
Englishmen to find Frenchies shipwrecked too!"
"It ain't," said the crew suspiciously.
"And even if it's all right, we bein' strangers might be led into
makin' a treaty without knowin' all there is to know. I vote waitin'
till the officers comes up."
They squatted down on rocks and on the lumps of tussac grass till the
captain and the two mates came along with the rest of the Frenchmen.
Hart communicated his suspicions to the skipper, who was decidedly
under the influence of alcohol.
"That's all right," said the Guffin thickly. "_We_ can manage
Frenchmen. They ain't goin' to make no French Shore question on no
more of our islands. One Newfoundland's enough for me. I'll show
you n'gotiations--'gotiashuns is my forte!" And he led the way over
the hill. Below them they saw the wreck of a French barquantine.
"Blimy," said the crowd, with a frown, "if they 'aven't got the best
part of our hisland!"
It was not to be endured by any lot of Englishmen under the sun, that
the best part of this rock should be occupied by their natural foes,
and soon there was evidence that in any attempt to turn the Frenchmen
out the British leader would have a united nation at his back.
The Guffin and the two mates argued it, and Lampert was the
Opposition.
"W'y, wot's this you're sayin'?" asked the disgusted skipper; "did I
think to 'ave shipped a Verning 'Arcourt among my lot? You're a
Little Englander, and nothin' but it, Lampert."
"They was here first," said Lampert obstinately.
"But the hisland is British ground," urged Simcox, "and where our
flag flies no Frenchman can have the best. We gives 'em liberty to
trade, and they can take what's left. What for have we always beat
'em if we're to give in now?"
"Continuosity of foreign politics is my motter," said the skipper.
"With continuosity and joodishus firmness, and a polite 'hout o'
this,' you'll see 'em listen to reason, and evacuate. I shall send
hin my hultimatum this very afternoon. And you, Simcox, shall be
hambassador."
Simcox looked anxious.
"Well, captain, I was thinking it would be judicious policy to send
in the Dutchman. It will remind them that Europe is more or less
agin them, and to have a Dutchman here will make 'em think twice
afore they elects for war."
The skipper shook his head.
"No, Simcox, it looks judicious on the surface, but takin' deeper
thought it ain't. It would aggerawate them, and that ain't policy.
We fights if we must, but don't start it by doin' anythin' unpleasin'
more'n askin' for our rights. And in n'gotiashuns it ain't policy to
remind 'em deliberate of the time the Prooshians beat 'em. And
moreover it's accordin' to no tradition I've heard of to send a
furriner as hambassador. No, Simcox, you shall go. I'll draw up the
hultimatum at once."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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