The Prophet, after a moment’s pause of contemplation, passed on through
a swing door, covered with green baize, and down some stairs to the
inner courts of this interesting region. This time he came to anchor in
a room which, he thought, might well have been a butler’s pantry had it
contained a large-sized telescope. It was in fact the parlour set apart
for the use of the kitchen and scullery maids, and was brightly fitted
up with a dresser, a cupboard for skewers, a rolling-pin, a basting
machine, and other similar adjuncts. It gave on to the kitchen, in which
the cat of the house was enjoying well-earned slumber in the attitude of
a black ball. So far his exploring tour had quite fulfilled the rather
vague expectations of the Prophet, but he now began to feel anxious.
Time was passing on and he had sworn to be at the telescope by eleven
sharp. He had, therefore, already slightly fractured his oath, and he
had no desire to earn the anathema of all such men as Robert Green by
breaking it into small pieces. Where was the butler’s pantry? He glanced
eagerly round the kitchen, perceived a door, passed through it, and
found himself confronted by a sink. He had gained the scullery, but not
his goal. To the right of the sink was yet another door through which
the Prophet, who carried the planisphere in one hand, the George the
Third candlestick in the other, rather excitedly debouched into a
good-sized passage. As he did so he heard the muffled alto voice of the
eight-day clock proclaim that it was a quarter-past eleven. Feeling that
he was now upon the point of breaking both the promises of the damned
fool, the Prophet hastened along the passage, darted through the first
outlet, and found himself abruptly face to back with what appeared at
first glance to be an enormously broad and bow-legged dwarf, with a bald
head and a black tail coat, which, in an attitude of savage curiosity,
was gazing through a gigantic instrument, whose muzzle projected from an
open window into a spacious area. So great was the Prophet’s surprise,
so supreme the shock to his whole nervous system occasioned by this
unexpected encounter, that he did not utter a cry. His amazement carried
him into that terrible region which lies beyond the realms of speech.
He simply stood quite still and gazed at the bow-legged dwarf, which,
in its turn, continued to gaze savagely through the gigantic instrument
into the area. Not for perhaps three or four minutes did the Prophet
realise that this dwarf was merely an ingeniously shortened form of Mr.
Ferdinand, who, with his legs very wide apart, and making two accurate
right angles at their respective knee-joints, his head thrown well
back, and his arms arranged in two perfect capital V’s, with the elbows
pointing directly at the walls on either side of him, had been busily
engaged for the last hour and a quarter in trying to focus firstly the
Lord Chancellor’s house on the opposite side of the square, and secondly
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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