Doyle, Arthur Conan, 1859-1930 -- Parodies, imitations, etc.; Fantasy fiction; Holmes, Sherlock (Fictitious character) -- Fiction
“Dr. Johnson’s point is well taken,” said a stranger who had been sitting
upon the string-piece of the pier, quietly, but with very evident
interest, listening to the discussion. He was a tall and excessively
slender shade, “like a spirt of steam out of a teapot,” as Johnson put it
afterwards, so slight he seemed. “I have not the honor of being a member
of this association,” the stranger continued, “but, like all well-ordered
shades, I aspire to the distinction, and I hold myself and my talents at
the disposal of this club. I fancy it will not take us long to establish
our initial point, which is that the gross person who has so foully
appropriated your property to his own base uses does not contemplate
removing it from its keel and placing it somewhere inland. All the
evidence in hand points to a radically different conclusion, which is my
sole reason for doubting the value of that conclusion. Captain Kidd is a
seafarer by instinct, not a landsman. The House-boat is not a house, but
a boat; therefore the place to look for it is not, as Dr. Johnson so well
says, in the Sahara Desert, or on the Alps, or in the State of Ohio, but
upon the high sea, or upon the waterfront of some one of the world’s
great cities.”
“And what, then, would be your plan?” asked Sir Walter, impressed by the
stranger’s manner as well as by the very manifest reason in all that he
had said.
“The chartering of a suitable vessel, fully armed and equipped for the
purpose of pursuit. Ascertain whither the House-boat has sailed, for
what port, and start at once. Have you a model of the House-boat within
reach?” returned the stranger.
“I think not; we have the architect’s plans, however,” said the chairman.
“We had, Mr. Chairman,” said Demosthenes, who was secretary of the House
Committee, rising, “but they are gone with the House-boat itself. They
were kept in the safe in the hold.”
A look of annoyance came into the face of the stranger.
“That’s too bad,” he said. “It was a most important part of my plan that
we should know about how fast the House-boat was.”
“Humph!” ejaculated Socrates, with ill-concealed sarcasm. “If you’ll
take Xanthippe’s word for it, the House-boat was the fastest yacht
afloat.”
“I refer to the matter of speed in sailing,” returned the stranger,
quietly. “The question of its ethical speed has nothing to do with it.”
“The designer of the craft is here,” said Sir Walter, fixing his eyes
upon Sir Christopher Wren. “It is possible that he may be of assistance
in settling that point.”
[Picture: What has all this got to do with the question]
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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