COPY OF LETTER FROM FIRM TO COMMERCIAL TRAVELLER. Sydney, 25th Jan., 1895. MR. EINSTEIN, Townsville, DEAR SIR, Ve hav receved your letter on the 18th mit expense agount and round list. vat ve vants is orders, ve haf plenty maps in Sydney vrom vich to make up round lists also big families to make expenses. Mr. Einstein ve find in going through your expenses agount 10s. for pilliards please don’t buy no more pilliards for us. vat ve vants is orders, also ve do see 30s. for a Horse and Buggy, vere is de horse and vot haf you done mit de Buggy the rest on your expenses agount vas nix but drinks--vy don’t you suck ice. ve sended you to day two boxes cigars, 1 costed 6/-and the oder 3/6 you can smoke the 6/- box, but gif de oders to your gustomers, ve send you also samples of a necktie vat costed us 28/-gross, sell dem for 30/-dozen if you can’t get 30/-take 8/6, vat ve vants is orders. The neckties is a novelty as ve hav dem in stock for seven years and ain’d sold none. My brother Louis says you should stop in Rockhampton. His cousin Marks livs dere. Louis says you should sell Marks a good bill; dry him mit de neckties first, and sell mostly for cash, he is Louis’s cousin. Ve only giv credit to dem gustomers vat pays cash. Don’t date any more bills ahead, as the days are longer in the summer as in the vinter. Don’t show Marks any of the good sellers, and finaly remember Mr. Einstein mit us veder you do bisness or you do nothings at all vat ve vants is orders. Yours Truly, SHADRACK & Co. P.S.--Keep the expenses down. 11. Two fathers and two sons went into a hotel to have drinks, which amounted to one shilling. They each spent the same amount. How much did each pay? 12. In a cricket match, a side of 11 men made a certain number of runs. One obtained one-eighth of the number, each of two others one-tenth, and each of three others one-twentieth. The rest made up among them 126 (the remainder of the score), and four of the last scored five times as many as the others. What was the whole number of runs, and the score of each man? BRAINS v. BRAWN. SCHOOLMASTER--“What is meant by mental occupation?” PUPIL--“One in which we use our minds.” SCHOOLMASTER--“And a manual occupation?” PUPIL--“One in which we use our hands.” SCHOOLMASTER--“Now, which of these occupations is mine. Come, now; what do I use most in teaching you?” PUPIL (quickly)--“Your cane, sir!” [Illustration] MAGIC ADDITION. _To write the answer of an addition sum, when only one line has been written._ 73468 52174 } pair 47825 } 69341 } pair 30658 } ------ 273466 ======