The Quest of the Simple LifeDawson, W. J. (William James)
Philosophy
The Quest of the Simple Life
Dawson, W. J. (William James)
Country life
He once confided to me
that he had brought off certain operations which had made him the
possessor of eighty thousand pounds. To me the sum seemed immense, but
he regarded it as a bagatelle. When I suggested certain uses for it,
such as retirement to the country, the building of a country house, the
collection of pictures or of a library, he laughed at me. He informed
me that he never spent more than a single day in the country every
year; it was spent in visiting his father at the old farm. He loathed
the quiet of the country, and counted his one day in the year an
infliction and a sacrifice. Books and pictures he had cared for once,
but as he now put it, he had 'no use for them.' It seemed that all his
eighty thousand pounds was destined to be flung upon the great roulette
table of stock and share speculations. It was not that he was
avaricious; few men cared less for money in itself; but he could not
live without the excitement of speculation. 'I prefer the air of
Throgmorton Street to any air in the world,' he observed. 'I am
unhappy if I leave it for a day.' So far as knowledge of or interest
in London went, he was not a whit better than poor shabby Arrowsmith.
His London stretched no further than from the Bank to Oxford Circus,
and the landmarks by which he knew it were restaurants and music-halls.
The man seemed so satisfied with everything about his life that it was
a kind of joy to meet him. The sourness of my own discontent was
dissolved in the alembic of his joviality. Yet it was certain that he
lived a life of the most torturing anxiety. There were recurring
periods when his fortune hung in the balance, and his financial
salvation was achieved as by fire. When he sat silent for a moment,
strange things were written on his face. Haggard lines ran across the
brow; the hollows underneath the eyes grew deep; and one could see that
black care sat upon his shoulders. There was a listening posture of
the head, as of one apprehensive of the footfall of disaster, and
though he was barely forty, his hair was white. What happened to him
finally I do not know. I missed him for a year or two; inquired at the
hotel where he had lived and found him gone; and I thought I read in
the sarcastic smile of the hotel-manager more knowledge than he was
willing to communicate. I imagine that he went down in some financial
storm, like ships at sea that are heard of no more; the Napoleon of
finance had somewhere found his Waterloo. The reflection is
inevitable; what had he got out of life after all? He had won neither
peace nor honour; he had known nothing of the finer joys or tastes; he
had enjoyed no satisfying pleasures; such triumph as he had known had
been the brief triumph of the gambler. Upon the whole I thought the
narrow tedious life of Arrowsmith the worthier.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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