Poor heart! like many another bewildered moth, Menie flutters about the
subject it behoves her most to avoid, and cannot help making timid
allusions to their future life in London--that future life which begins
to darken before her own vision under a cloudy horizon of doubt and
dread. It has ceased to be a speculation now, this future; for even
within these few days there has been talk of Menie’s marriage.
“We will speak of some other thing; there is no very great charm in the
future for me, Menie,” said Mrs Laurie, with a sigh.
But Menie, with trembling temerity, begs to know the reason why.
Why?--what concerns her concerns her mother also. Very timid, yet too
bold, Menie insists, and will be satisfied--why?
“Because it is hard to lose my only child,” said Mrs Laurie. “Let us not
deceive ourselves; it is easy to say we will not be separated, that
there shall be no change. I know better, Menie; well, well! do not
cry--say it is only the natural lot.”
“What is only the natural lot? O mother, mother! tell me.” Menie is
still pertinacious, even through her tears.
“I will tell you, Menie,” said Mrs Laurie, quickly. “Randall Home and I
cannot dwell under one roof in peace. I foresee a wretched life for you
if we tried it; a constant struggle--a constant failure. Menie, I will
try to be content; but your mother feels it hard to yield up you and
your love to a stranger--very hard. I ought to be content and
submissive. I ought to remember that it is the common necessity--an
every-day trial; but we have been more to each other than mere mother
and daughter. I cannot hide it from you, Menie; this trial is very
grievous to me.”
“Mother! mother!” It is not “for nothing” now that Menie Laurie weeps.
“You have been the light of my eyes for twenty years--my baby, my only
bairn! I have nothing in the world when you are gone. Menie, have
patience with your mother. I thought we might have been one household
still. I never thought I could have hurt my bairn by clinging to her
with all my heart. I see through another medium now. Menie, this that I
say is better for us both. I would lose my proper place--I would lose
even my own esteem--if I insisted, or if I permitted you to insist, upon
our first plan. I do not mean to insist with Randall,” said Mrs Laurie,
with a sudden flush of colour, “but with ourselves. It is not for your
credit, any more than mine, that your mother should be unnecessarily
humiliated; and I choose to make this decision myself, Menie, not to
have it forced upon me.”
“If you think so--if I have nothing to hope but this--mother, mother!”
cried Menie in her sobs, “there is yet time; we can change it all.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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