Domestic fiction; Family -- England -- Midlands -- Fiction; Midlands (England) -- Fiction
The wind blew Ursula’s face, and her clothes cleaved to her limbs. But
it was a surging, turgid wind, instinct with compressed vigour of life.
And she seemed to have lost Skrebensky. Out there in the strong, urgent
night she could not find him.
“Where are you?” she asked.
“Here,” came his bodiless voice.
And groping, she touched him. A fire like lightning drenched them.
“Anton?” she said.
“What?” he answered.
She held him with her hands in the darkness, she felt his body again
with hers.
“Don’t leave me—come back to me,” she said.
“Yes,” he said, holding her in his arms.
But the male in him was scotched by the knowledge that she was not
under his spell nor his influence. He wanted to go away from her. He
rested in the knowledge that to-morrow he was going away, his life was
really elsewhere. His life was elsewhere—his life was elsewhere—the
centre of his life was not what she would have. She was different—there
was a breach between them. They were hostile worlds.
“You will come back to me?” she reiterated.
“Yes,” he said. And he meant it. But as one keeps an appointment, not
as a man returning to his fulfilment.
So she kissed him, and went indoors, lost. He walked down to the Marsh
abstracted. The contact with her hurt him, and threatened him. He
shrank, he had to be free of her spirit. For she would stand before
him, like the angel before Balaam, and drive him back with a sword from
the way he was going, into a wilderness.
The next day she went to the station to see him go. She looked at him,
she turned to him, but he was always so strange and null—so null. He
was so collected. She thought it was that which made him null.
Strangely nothing he was.
Ursula stood near him with a mute, pale face which he would rather not
see. There seemed some shame at the very root of life, cold, dead shame
for her.
The three made a noticeable group on the station; the girl in her fur
cap and tippet and her olive green costume, pale, tense with youth,
isolated, unyielding; the soldierly young man in a crush hat and a
heavy overcoat, his face rather pale and reserved above his purple
scarf, his whole figure neutral; then the elder man, a fashionable
bowler hat pressed low over his dark brows, his face warm-coloured and
calm, his whole figure curiously suggestive of full-blooded
indifference; he was the eternal audience, the chorus, the spectator at
the drama; in his own life he would have no drama.
The train was rushing up. Ursula’s heart heaved, but the ice was frozen
too strong upon it.
“Good-bye,” she said, lifting her hand, her face laughing with her
peculiar, blind, almost dazzling laugh. She wondered what he was doing,
when he stooped and kissed her. He should be shaking hands and going.
“Good-bye,” she said again.
He picked up his little bag and turned his back on her. There was a
hurry along the train. Ah, here was his carriage. He took his seat. Tom
Brangwen shut the door, and the two men shook hands as the whistle
went.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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