Domestic fiction; Family -- England -- Midlands -- Fiction; Midlands (England) -- Fiction
But he was already stepping on to the threshold, and closing the door
behind him. She turned into the kitchen, startled out of herself by
this invasion from the night. He took off his hat, and came towards
her. Then he stood in the light, in his black clothes and his black
stock, hat in one hand and yellow flowers in the other. She stood away,
at his mercy, snatched out of herself. She did not know him, only she
knew he was a man come for her. She could only see the dark-clad man’s
figure standing there upon her, and the gripped fist of flowers. She
could not see the face and the living eyes.
He was watching her, without knowing her, only aware underneath of her
presence.
“I come to have a word with you,” he said, striding forward to the
table, laying down his hat and the flowers, which tumbled apart and lay
in a loose heap. She had flinched from his advance. She had no will, no
being. The wind boomed in the chimney, and he waited. He had
disembarrassed his hands. Now he shut his fists.
He was aware of her standing there unknown, dread, yet related to him.
“I came up,” he said, speaking curiously matter-of-fact and level, “to
ask if you’d marry me. You are free, aren’t you?”
There was a long silence, whilst his blue eyes, strangely impersonal,
looked into her eyes to seek an answer to the truth. He was looking for
the truth out of her. And she, as if hypnotized, must answer at length.
“Yes, I am free to marry.”
The expression of his eyes changed, became less impersonal, as if he
were looking almost at her, for the truth of her. Steady and intent and
eternal they were, as if they would never change. They seemed to fix
and to resolve her. She quivered, feeling herself created, will-less,
lapsing into him, into a common will with him.
“You want me?” she said.
A pallor came over his face.
“Yes,” he said.
Still there was no response and silence.
“No,” she said, not of herself. “No, I don’t know.”
He felt the tension breaking up in him, his fists slackened, he was
unable to move. He stood there looking at her, helpless in his vague
collapse. For the moment she had become unreal to him. Then he saw her
come to him, curiously direct and as if without movement, in a sudden
flow. She put her hand to his coat.
“Yes I want to,” she said, impersonally, looking at him with wide,
candid, newly-opened eyes, opened now with supreme truth. He went very
white as he stood, and did not move, only his eyes were held by hers,
and he suffered. She seemed to see him with her newly-opened, wide
eyes, almost of a child, and with a strange movement, that was agony to
him, she reached slowly forward her dark face and her breast to him,
with a slow insinuation of a kiss that made something break in his
brain, and it was darkness over him for a few moments.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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