Americans -- France -- Fiction; Domestic fiction; France -- Fiction; Love stories; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction
The reflection set him wondering whether the “sheltered” girl’s
bringing-up might not unfit her for all subsequent contact with life.
How much nearer to it had Mrs. Leath been brought by marriage and
motherhood, and the passage of fourteen years? What were all her
reticences and evasions but the result of the deadening process of
forming a “lady”? The freshness he had marvelled at was like the
unnatural whiteness of flowers forced in the dark.
As he looked back at their few days together he saw that their
intercourse had been marked, on her part, by the same hesitations and
reserves which had chilled their earlier intimacy. Once more they had
had their hour together and she had wasted it. As in her girlhood, her
eyes had made promises which her lips were afraid to keep. She was still
afraid of life, of its ruthlessness, its danger and mystery. She was
still the petted little girl who cannot be left alone in the dark...His
memory flew back to their youthful story, and long-forgotten details
took shape before him. How frail and faint the picture was! They seemed,
he and she, like the ghostly lovers of the Grecian Urn, forever pursuing
without ever clasping each other. To this day he did not quite know
what had parted them: the break had been as fortuitous as the fluttering
apart of two seed-vessels on a wave of summer air...
The very slightness, vagueness, of the memory gave it an added
poignancy. He felt the mystic pang of the parent for a child which
has just breathed and died. Why had it happened thus, when the least
shifting of influences might have made it all so different? If she had
been given to him then he would have put warmth in her veins and light
in her eyes: would have made her a woman through and through. Musing
thus, he had the sense of waste that is the bitterest harvest of
experience. A love like his might have given her the divine gift of
self-renewal; and now he saw her fated to wane into old age repeating
the same gestures, echoing the words she had always heard, and
perhaps never guessing that, just outside her glazed and curtained
consciousness, life rolled away, a vast blackness starred with lights,
like the night landscape beyond the windows of the train.
The engine lowered its speed for the passage through a sleeping station.
In the light of the platform lamp Darrow looked across at his companion.
Her head had dropped toward one shoulder, and her lips were just far
enough apart for the reflection of the upper one to deepen the colour
of the other. The jolting of the train had again shaken loose the lock
above her ear. It danced on her cheek like the flit of a brown wing over
flowers, and Darrow felt an intense desire to lean forward and put it
back behind her ear.
IV
As their motor-cab, on the way from the Gare du Nord, turned into the
central glitter of the Boulevard, Darrow had bent over to point out an
incandescent threshold.
“There!”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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