The Remarkable History of Sir Thomas Upmore, bart., M.P., formerly known as "Tommy Upmore"Blackmore, R. D. (Richard Doddridge)
General
The Remarkable History of Sir Thomas Upmore, bart., M.P., formerly known as "Tommy Upmore"
Blackmore, R. D. (Richard Doddridge)
Great Britain -- Politics and government -- 19th century -- Fiction; Satire
And before very long, there was no doubt left; for the captain of the
College Boat-club called upon me, quite early in the day, and apologized
for self-introduction, on the score of public duty. As behoved a
fresh-man, I was rather nervous in the presence of one so exalted; but
he very soon set me at my ease; and as soon as the buttery was open, I
sent for a tankard of Corpus ale, at his most kind suggestion. In a very
pleasant manner, he drank my health, and said that he saw a great future
before me, if I would only go in for it. I begged him to explain; which
he did at once, after asking whether, as a Corpus-man, I would let him
drop all formality. Being proud to be called a Corpus-man--_a lucus a
non lucendo_ nuncupative--I assured him once for all of my good-will,
and freedom from little prejudices. Thereupon he stood up, and asked me
to do the same; and without further ceremony took me by the collar, and
with one arm at full length, held me in the air, without even putting
his lips together. At first, I was certainly surprised a little, having
heard so much of Oxford etiquette; but the smile on his face reassured
me.
"Noble!" he exclaimed, "even better than I hoped. Upmore, we shall be
head of the river, four nights after the eights begin. And the beauty of
it is, that you look quite unlike a feather-weight."
All this was far beyond my comprehension; and he laughed again, when I
told him so.
"Why, of course, what I mean is, that we want a coxswain, and you are
the very man for it. Our present man is two stone too heavy, as well as
a bad hand at the lines. And no man fit for it came up, last term."
"What lines?" I asked, "I can say the Georgics, and all the odes of
Horace, and the three first books of the '_Iliad_,' except the catalogue
of ships; but I don't know what a coxswain is."
"We'll soon teach you the catalogue of ships," he answered, with a laugh
at his own wit; "and the Corpus ship shall be the first. And as for not
knowing what a coxswain is, you are all the better for that, because you
can't have formed a bad style yet. Can you tell me exactly what your
weight is? I should say well under eight."
Upon this point I satisfied him, by producing the ticket of the
Standard-man; which exalted me yet more in his esteem.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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