Sir LUCIUS Now--you're quite out--for if you stand so when I take my aim---- [Levelling at him.] ACRES Zounds! Sir Lucius--are you sure it is not cocked? Sir LUCIUS Never fear. ACRES But--but--you don't know--it may go off of its own head! Sir LUCIUS Pho! be easy.--Well, now if I hit you in the body, my bullet has a double chance--for if it misses a vital part of your right side, 'twill be very hard if it don't succeed on the left! ACRES A vital part! Sir LUCIUS But, there--fix yourself so--[Placing him]--let him see the broad-side of your full front--there--now a ball or two may pass clean through your body, and never do any harm at all. ACRES Clean through me!--a ball or two clean through me! Sir LUCIUS Ay--may they--and it is much the genteelest attitude into the bargain. ACRES Look'ee! Sir Lucius--I'd just as lieve be shot in an awkward posture as a genteel one; so, by my valour! I will stand edgeways. Sir LUCIUS [Looking at his watch.] Sure they don't mean to disappoint us--Hah!--no, faith--I think I see them coming. ACRES Hey!--what!--coming!---- Sir LUCIUS Ay.--Who are those yonder getting over the stile? ACRES There are two of them indeed!--well--let them come--hey, Sir Lucius!--we--we--we--we--won't run. Sir LUCIUS Run! ACRES No--I say--we won't run, by my valour! Sir LUCIUS What the devil's the matter with you? ACRES Nothing--nothing--my dear friend--my dear Sir Lucius--but I--I--I don't feel quite so bold, somehow, as I did. Sir LUCIUS O fy!--consider your honour. ACRES Ay--true--my honour. Do, Sir Lucius, edge in a word or two every now and then about my honour. Sir LUCIUS [Looking.] Well, here they're coming. ACRES Sir Lucius--if I wa'n't with you, I should almost think I was afraid.--If my valour should leave me!--Valour will come and go. Sir LUCIUS Then pray keep it fast, while you have it. ACRES Sir Lucius--I doubt it is going--yes--my valour is certainly going!--it is sneaking off!--I feel it oozing out as it were at the palms of my hands! Sir LUCIUS Your honour--your honour.--Here they are. ACRES O mercy!--now--that I was safe at Clod-Hall! or could be shot before I was aware! [Enter FAULKLAND and CAPTAIN ABSOLUTE.] Sir LUCIUS Gentlemen, your most obedient.--Hah!--what, Captain Absolute!--So, I suppose, sir, you are come here, just like myself--to do a kind office, first for your friend--then to proceed to business on your own account. ACRES What, Jack!--my dear Jack!--my dear friend! ABSOLUTE Hark'ee, Bob, Beverley's at hand. Sir LUCIUS Well, Mr. Acres--I don't blame your saluting the gentleman civilly.--[To FAULKLAND.] So, Mr. Beverley, if you'll choose your weapons, the captain and I will measure the ground. FAULKLAND My weapons, sir! ACRES Odds life! Sir Lucius, I'm not going to fight Mr. Faulkland; these are my particular friends. Sir LUCIUS What, sir, did you not come here to fight Mr. Acres? FAULKLAND Not I, upon my word, sir.