Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; World War, 1914-1918 -- Fiction
Instead of the ship she found the Barrow Farm beeches. They stood in a
thick ring round a clearing of grey grass and grey light. John was
standing there with a woman. She turned and showed her sharp face, the
colour of white clay, her long evil nose, her eyes tilted corner and the
thin tail of her mouth, writhing. That was Miss Lister who had been in
Gibson's office. She had John now.
Forms without faces, shrouded white women, larvae slipped from the black
grooves of the beech trunks; they made a ring round him with their
bodies, drew it in tighter and tighter. The grey light beat like a pulse
with the mounting horror.
She cried out his name, and her voice sounded tragic and immense; sharp
like a blade of lightning screaming up to the top of the sky. A black
iron curtain crashed down before her and cut off the dream.
Gwinnie looked up over the crook of her knee from the boot she was
lacing.
"You made no end of a row in your sleep, Sharlie."
* * * * *
She had dreamed about him again, the next night. He was walking with her
on the road from the town to the Farm. By the lime kiln at the turn he
disappeared. He had never been there, really.
She had gone out to look for him. The road kept on curling round like a
snake, bringing her back and back to the white gate of the Farm.
When she got through the gate she stepped off the field on to the low
bridge over a black canal. The long, sharp-pointed road cut straight as a
dyke through the flat fields, between two lines of slender trees, tall
poles with tufted tops.
She knew she was awake now because the light whitened and the wind moved
in the tree tufts and the road felt hard under her feet. When she came to
the village, to the long grey walls with narrow shutters, she knew John
was there. He came down the street towards the canal bridge. A group of
women and children walked with him, dressed in black. Dutch women. Dutch
babies. She could see their overalls and high caps and large, upturned
shoes very black and distinct in the white light. This was real.
They pointed their fingers and stared at her with secretive, inimical
faces. Terror crept in over the street, subtle, drifting and penetrating
like an odour.
John's face was happy and excited; that was how she knew him. His face
was real, its happiness and excitement were real. But as he passed her it
changed; it turned on her with a look she didn't know. Eyes of hatred,
eyes that repudiated and betrayed her.
* * * * *
The third night; the third dream.
She had lost John and was looking for him; walking a long time through a
country she could no longer see or remember. She came out of blank space
to the river bridge and the red town. She could see the road
switchbacking over the bridge and turning sharp and slanting up the river
bank to the ramparts.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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