Yet she remained calm like a sensible person, who knows that rushing
about in excitement is not the way to meet unknown dangers. She swept
her eyes over the room and saw the lieutenant’s valise in a corner. That
was really what she had wanted to see. He wasn’t gone then. But it
didn’t tell her, though she opened it, what had become of him. As to his
return, she had no doubt whatever about that. He had always returned.
She noticed particularly a large packet sewn up in sail-cloth and with
three large red seals on the seam. It didn’t, however, arrest her
thoughts. Those were still hovering about Catherine and Peyrol
downstairs. How changed they were. Had they ever thought that she was
mad? She became indignant. “How could I have prevented that?” she asked
herself with despair. She sat down on the edge of the bed in her usual
attitude, her feet crossed, her hands lying in her lap. She felt on one
of them the impress of Réal’s lips, soothing, reassuring like every
certitude, but she was aware of a still remaining confusion in her mind,
an indefinite weariness like the strain of an imperfect vision trying to
discern shifting outlines, floating shapes, incomprehensible signs. She
could not resist the temptation of resting her tired body, just for a
little while.
She lay down on the very edge of the bed, the kissed hand tucked under
her cheek. The faculty of thinking abandoned her altogether, but she
remained open-eyed, wide awake. In that position, without hearing the
slightest sound, she saw the door handle move down as far as it would
go, perfectly noiseless, as though the lock had been oiled not long
before. Her impulse was to leap right out into the middle of the room,
but she restrained herself and only swung herself into a sitting
posture. The bed had not creaked. She lowered her feet gently to the
ground, and by the time when holding her breath she put her ear against
the door, the handle had come back into position. She had detected no
sound outside. Not the faintest. Nothing. It never occurred to her to
doubt her own eyes, but the whole thing had been so noiseless that it
could not have disturbed the lightest sleeper. She was sure that had she
been lying on her other side, that is with her back to the door, she
would have known nothing. It was some time before she walked away from
the door and sat on a chair which stood near a heavy and much-carved
table, an heirloom more appropriate to a château than to a farmhouse.
The dust of many months covered its smooth oval surface of dark, finely
grained wood.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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