“I don’t know what she thinks, John. To tell you the truth, dear, I
don’t know anything about her, and I never did. I don’t know why she
went to Dover Street or why she came back. She’s never told me and I’ve
never asked her. When I catch her face sometimes, I can see in it
something that makes my heart miss a beat. I can’t describe it. It may
be pain, it may be joy,—I don’t know. I can’t tell. But it isn’t regret
and it isn’t sorrow. It lights her up like, as though there was
something burning in her heart. John, our little girl’s miles away from
us, although she’s never been nearer. She dreams, I think, and walks in
another world with some one. We’ve got to be very kind to her, old man.
She’s—she’s a strange, strange child.”
Breezy pushed himself out of the sofa as a rather heavily laden boat is
oozed out of mud. He was irritable and perhaps a little frightened.
“I don’t find her strange,” he said. “Strange! What a word! She’s a good
girl, that’s what she is,—as open as a book, with nothing to hide. And
she’s our girl, and she’s doing her job without grumbling, and she’s
doubling the business. And what’s more, she’s cheerful and happy and
loving. I’m damned if I can see anything strange about her. You
certainly have a knack of saying queer things about Lola, one way ’n’
another, you have!” And he marched out of the parlor in a kind of fat
huff, only to march back again immediately to put his arm round the
little woman’s neck and give her an apologetic kiss. He was one of these
men who loved peace at any price and erected high barriers round himself
in order that he shouldn’t see anything to disturb his ease of mind. It
was the same form of brain anæmia, the same lack of moral courage from
which the Liberal Government had suffered in the face of the warning of
Lord Roberts. In other words, the policy of the ostrich. Knowing very
well that his wife had all the brains of the partnership and never said
anything for the mere sake of saying it, he was quite sure that she was
right as to Lola, and he had himself almost swallowed one of the little
screws that played so large a part in the interior of his watches on
seeing the look that Mrs. Breezy had described on the face of his little
girl as she sat perched up on a high stool waiting for the next
customer, with her eyes on something very far away. And because this
gave him a jar and frightened him a little, he persuaded himself that
what he had seen he had not seen, because it was uncomfortable to see
it. It is a form of mental dope and it suits all sorts of
constitutions,—like religion.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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