The Satyricon of Petronius ArbiterPetronius Arbiter
General
The Satyricon of Petronius Arbiter
Petronius Arbiter
Rome -- Fiction; Satire, Latin -- Translations into English
While I was denying I knew the house, I observ'd a company of beaux
reading the bills o'er the cells, on which was inscrib'd the name of
the whore and her price; and others of the same function naked,
scuttling it here and there, as if they would not, yet would be seen:
When too late I found my self in a bawdy-house, cursing the jade that
had trapan'd me thither, I cover'd my head and was just making off
through the midst of them, when in the very entry Ascyltos met me, but
as tir'd as my self, and in a manner dead; you'd have sworn the same
old woman brought him. I could not forbear laughing, but having
saluted each other, I ask'd what business he had in so scandalous a
place? He wip'd his face, and "if you knew," said he, "what has
happened to me--" "As what?" quoth I.
He faintly reply'd "When I had rov'd the whole city without finding
where I had left the inn, the master of this house came up to me, and
kindly profer'd to be my guide; so through many a cross lane and blind
turning, having brought me to this house, he drew his weapon and prest
for a closer ingagement. In this affliction the whore of the cell
also demanded garnish-money; and he laid such hands on me, that had I
not been too strong for him, I had gone by the worst of it."
While Ascyltos was telling his tale, in come the same fellow, with a
woman, none of the least agreeable, and looking upon Ascyltos,
entreated him to walk in and fear nothing, for if he would not be
passive he might be active: the woman on the other hand press'd me to
go in with her. We follow'd therefore, and being led among those
bills, we saw many of both sexes at work in the cells, so much every
of them seem'd to have taken a provocative.
Nor were we sooner discover'd than they wou'd have been at us with the
like impudence, and in a trice one of them, his coat tuck'd under his
girdle, laid hold on Ascyltos, and threw him athwart a couch: I
presently ran to help the undermost, and putting our strengths
together, we made nothing of the troublesome fool. Ascyltos went off,
and flying, left me expos'd to the fury; but, thanks to my strength, I
got off without hurt.
I had almost traverst the city round, when through the dusk I saw Gito
on the beggars-bench of our inn; I made up to him, and going in, ask'd
him, what Ascyltos had got us for dinner? the boy sitting down on the
bed, began to wipe the tears that stood in his eyes; I was much
concern'd at it, and ask'd him the occasion; he was slow in his
answer, and seem'd unwilling; but mixing threats with my intreaties;
"'Twas that brother or comrogue of yours," said he, "that coming ere
while into our lodging, wou'd have been at me, and put hard for it.
When I cry'd out, he drew his sword, and 'if thou art a Lucreece,'
said he, 'thou hast met a Tarquin.'"
I heard him, and shaking my fist at Ascyltos; "What saist thou," said
I, "thou catamite, whose very breath is tainted?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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