We judging the mess to be sacred, that was so gorgeously set out, stood up and began a health to the august founder, the father of his country: After which reverence, failing to catch that catch could, we filled our napkins and I chiefly, who thought nothing too good for my boy Gito. During this, in came three boys in white, their coats tuck'd about them; of whom, two set on the table three household gods with broaches about their necks, and the other bearing round us a goblet of wine, cry'd aloud, "Be the gods favourable!" "The name of this," said he, "is cobler, that other's good-luck, and the third's spend-all:" And as the image of Trimalchio was carryed round, and every one kiss'd it, we thought it a shame not to do as the rest of the company. After this, when all of us had wished him health and happiness, Trimalchio, turning to Niceros, "You were wont," said he, "to be a good companion, but what's the matter we get not a word from ye now? Let me entreat ye, as you would see me happy, do not break an old custom." Niceros, pleased with the frankness of his friend: "Let me never thrive," said he, "if I am not ready to caper out of my skin, to see you in so good a humours; therefore what I say shall be all mirth; tho' I am afraid those grave fopps may laugh: but let them look to 't, I'll go on nevertheless; for what am I the worse for any one swearing? I had rather they laugh at what I say, than at my self." Thus when he spake---- ----he began this tale:-- "While I was yet a servant we liv'd in a narrow lane, now the house of Gavilla: There, as the gods would have it, I fell in love with Tarentius's wife; he kept an eating-house. Ye all knew Melissa Tarentina, a pretty little punching-block, and withal beautiful; but (so help me Hercules) I minded her not so much for the matter of the point of that, as that she was good-humour'd; if I asked her any thing, she never deny'd me; and what money I had, I trusted her with it; nor did she ever fail me when I'd occasion. It so happened, that a she-companion of hers had dy'd in the country, and she was gone thither; how to come at her I could not tell; but a friend is seen at a dead lift; it also happened my master was gone to Capua to dispatch somewhat or other: I laid hold of the opportunity, and persuaded mine host to take an evenings walk of four or five miles out of town, for he was a stout fellow, and as bold as a devil: The moon shone as bright as day, and about cock-crowing we fell in with a burying-place, and certain monument of the dead: my man loitered behind me a-star-gazing, and I sitting expecting him, fell a singing and numbering them; when looking round me, what should I see but mine host stript stark-naked, and his cloaths lying by the high-wayside. The sight struck me every where, and I stood as if I had been dead; but he piss'd round his cloaths, and of a sudden was turned to a wolf: Don't think I jest; I value no man's estate at that rate, as to tell a lye.