_Yo. Lo._ Sir, I do not; thou art my Brothers Steward, his cast off
mill-money, his Kitchen Arithmetick.
_Sa._ Sir, I hope you will not make so little of me?
_Yo. Lo._ I make thee not so little as thou art: for indeed there goes no
more to the making of a Steward, but a fair _Imprimis_, and then a
reasonable _Item_ infus'd into him, and the thing is done.
_Sa._ Nay then you stir my duty, and I must tell you?
_Young Lo._ What wouldst thou tell me, how Hopps grow, or hold some rotten
discourse of Sheep, or when our Lady-day falls? Prethee farewel, and
entertain my friends, be drunk and burn thy Table-books: and my dear spark
of velvet, thou and I.
_Sa._ Good Sir remember?
_Young Lo._ I do remember thee a foolish fellow, one that did put his
trust in Almanacks, and Horse-fairs, and rose by Hony and Pot-butter.
Shall they come in yet?
_Sa_. Nay then I must unfold your Brothers pleasure, these be the lessons
Sir, he left behind him.
_Young Lo_. Prethee expound the first.
_Sa_. I leave to maintain my house three hundred pounds a year; and my
Brother to dispose of it.
_Young Lo_. Mark that my wicked Steward, and I dispose of it?
_Sav_. Whilest he bears himself like a Gentleman, and my credit falls not
in him. Mark that my good young Sir, mark that.
_Young Lo_. Nay, if it be no more I shall fulfil it, whilst my Legs will
carry me I'le bear my self Gentleman-like, but when I am drunk, let them
bear me that can. Forward dear Steward.
_Sav_. Next it is my will, that he be furnished (as my Brother) with
Attendance, Apparel, and the obedience of my people.
_Young Lo_. Steward this is as plain as your old Minikin-breeches. Your
wisdom will relent now, will it not? Be mollified or--you understand me
Sir, proceed?
_Sav_. Next, that my Steward keep his place, and power, and bound my
Brother's wildness with his care.
_Young Lo_. I'le hear no more of this _Apocrypha_, bind it by it self
Steward.
_Sav_. This is your Brothers will, and as I take it, he makes no mention
of such company as you would draw unto you. Captains of Gallyfoists, such
as in a clear day have seen _Callis_, fellows that have no more of God,
than their Oaths come to: they wear swords to reach fire at a Play, and
get there the oyl'd end of a Pipe, for their Guerdon: then the remnant of
your Regiment, are wealthy Tobacco-Marchants, that set up with one Ounce,
and break for three: together with a Forlorn hope of Poets, and all these
look like Carthusians, things without linnen: Are these fit company for my
Masters Brother?
_Young Lo_. I will either convert thee (O thou Pagan Steward) or presently
confound thee and thy reckonings, who's there? Call in the Gentlemen.
_Sav_. Good Sir.
_Young Lo_. Nay, you shall know both who I am, and where I am.
_Sav_. Are you my Masters Brother?
_Young Lo_. Are you the sage Master Steward, with a face like an old
_Ephemerides_?
_Enter his Comrades_, Captain, Traveller, &c.
_Sav_. Then God help us all I say.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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