General Miles, in company with a friend, was walking down Pennsylvania Avenue, when a person, entirely unknown to the veteran soldier, rushed up to him, and grasping his hand, said, warmly, "Well, Nelse, old boy, I'll bet anything you don't remember me!" "You win!" coldly and laconically replied Miles, as he released himself from the grasp of the stranger and resumed his walk.--_Woman's Home Companion._ SORRY HE LEARNED IT. Attorney William S. Barnes, of San Francisco, has a new office boy. The last boy with whom he was associated resigned a few days ago because the law business did not suit his peculiar temperament. "How long have you been here?" asked Barnes, when the small boy made known his intention to engage in a different vocation. "Six months," replied the boy. "And you don't like the law business?" "Naw. It's no good, and I tell you straight, I'm mighty sorry I learned it."--_Technical World._ WHAT FIELD WANTED. Eugene Field, sad of countenance and ready of tongue, strayed into a New York restaurant and seated himself at a table. To him there came a swift and voluble waiter, who said: "Coffee, tea-chocolate, ham 'n' 'ggs--beef-steak--mutton--chop--fishballs --hash'n'--beans," and much more to the same purpose. Field looked at him long and solemnly, and at last replied: "Oh, friend, I want none of these things. All I require is an orange and a few kind words." DECIDEDLY "WILLIN'." Miss Maude Adams has a favorite story about a certain "Miss Johnsing" and an uncertain "Culpeper Pete." Pete became enamored of the dusky maiden and not having the courage to "pop" face to face, called up the house where she worked and asked for her over the telephone. When he got her on the line he asked: "Is dat Miss Johnsing?" "Ya-as." "Well, Miss Johnsing, I'se got a most important question to ask you." "Ya-as." "Will you marry me?" "Ya-as! Who is it, please?"--_Exchange._ A HEROIC RESCUE. The following sublime paragraph is from one of the latest fashionable novels: "With one hand he held her beautiful head above the chilling waves, and with the other called loudly for assistance!"--_Exchange._ WHY SHE WAS MADE OF A RIB. A young woman having asked a surgeon why woman was made from the rib of a man in preference to any other bone, he gave the following gallant answer: "She was not taken from the head lest she should rule over him; nor from his feet, lest he should trample upon her; but she was taken from his side, that she might be his equal; from under his arm, that he might protect her; from near his heart that he might cherish and love her."--_Exchange._ A GRACIOUS JUDGE. Lord Ellenborough once said to a barrister, upon his asking in the midst of a boring harangue: "Is it the pleasure of the court that I should proceed with my statement?" "Pleasure, Mr. Smith, has been out of the question for a long time, but you may proceed."--_Old scrap book._ LIGHT.