The Second Thoughts of an Idle Fellow — John Shaqi
The Second Thoughts of an Idle FellowJerome, Jerome K. (Jerome Klapka)
General
The Second Thoughts of an Idle Fellow
Jerome, Jerome K. (Jerome Klapka)
English essays; English wit and humor
No, Cinderella, you were human, that is all. The artist, shivering in
his conventional attic, dreaming of Fame!—do you think he is not hoping
she will come to his loving arms in the form Jove came to Danae? Do you
think he is not reckoning also upon the good dinners and the big cigars,
the fur coat and the diamond studs, that her visits will enable him to
purchase?
There is a certain picture very popular just now. You may see it,
Cinderella, in many of the shop-windows of the town. It is called “The
Dream of Love,” and it represents a beautiful young girl, sleeping in a
very beautiful but somewhat disarranged bed. Indeed, one hopes, for the
sleeper’s sake, that the night is warm, and that the room is fairly free
from draughts. A ladder of light streams down from the sky into the
room, and upon this ladder crowd and jostle one another a small army of
plump Cupids, each one laden with some pledge of love. Two of the Imps
are emptying a sack of jewels upon the floor. Four others are bearing,
well displayed, a magnificent dress (a “confection,” I believe, is the
proper term) cut somewhat low, but making up in train what is lacking
elsewhere. Others bear bonnet boxes from which peep stylish toques and
bewitching hoods. Some, representing evidently wholesale houses, stagger
under silks and satins in the piece. Cupids are there from the
shoemakers with the daintiest of _bottines_. Stockings, garters, and
even less mentionable articles, are not forgotten. Caskets, mirrors,
twelve-buttoned gloves, scent-bottles and handkerchiefs, hair-pins, and
the gayest of parasols, has the God of Love piled into the arms of his
messengers. Really a most practical, up-to-date God of Love, moving with
the times! One feels that the modern Temple of Love must be a sort of
Swan and Edgar’s; the god himself a kind of celestial shop-walker; while
his mother, Venus, no doubt superintends the costume department. Quite
an Olympian Whiteley, this latter-day Eros; he has forgotten nothing,
for, at the back of the picture, I notice one Cupid carrying a rather fat
heart at the end of a string.
You, Cinderella, could give good counsel to that sleeping child. You
would say to her—“Awake from such dreams. The contents of a pawnbroker’s
store-room will not bring you happiness. Dream of love if you will; that
is a wise dream, even if it remain ever a dream. But these coloured
beads, these Manchester goods! are you then—you, heiress of all the
ages—still at heart only as some poor savage maiden but little removed
above the monkeys that share the primeval forest with her? Will you sell
your gold to the first trader that brings you _this_ barter? These
things, child, will only dazzle your eyes for a few days. Do you think
the Burlington Arcade is the gate of Heaven?”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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