'As I told you before,' she writes, 'M. and Madame Heger are the only
two persons in the house for whom I really experience regard and esteem;
and of course I cannot be always with them, nor even very often. They
told me, when I first returned, that I was to consider their
sitting-room my sitting-room, and to go there whenever I was not engaged
in the schoolroom. This, however, I cannot do. In the daytime it is a
public room, where music-masters and mistresses are constantly passing
in and out; and in the evening I will not, and ought not, to intrude on
M. and Madame Heger and their children. Thus I am a good deal by
myself; but that does not signify. I now regularly give English lessons
to M. Heger and his brother-in-law. They get on with wonderful rapidity,
especially the first.[1]
So that, up to this date, no cloud is visible. But by May 29 there is a
cloud above the horizon. It is no bigger than 'a man's hand' as yet: but
it is charged with electricity, and one knows the storm is gathering.
This time Charlotte is writing to Emily, _who never liked M. Heger for
her part_. 'Things wag on much as usual here, only Mlle. Blanche and
Mlle. Haussé are at present on a system of war without quarter. They
hate each other like two cats. Mlle. Blanche frightens Mlle. Haussé by
her white passions, for they quarrel venomously; Mlle. Haussé complains
that when Mlle. Blanche is in a fury "_elle n'a pas de lèvres_." I find
also that Mlle. Sophie dislikes Mlle. Blanche extremely. She says she is
heartless, insincere and vindictive, which epithets, I assure you, are
richly deserved. _Also I find she is the regular spy of Madame Heger,
to whom she reports everything. Also she invents, which I should not
have thought_. I am [not] richly off for companionship in these parts.
_Of late days, M. and Madame Heger rarely speak to me; and I really
don't pretend to care a fig for anybody else in the establishment_. You
are not to suppose by that expression that I am under the influence of
_warm_ affection for Madame Heger. _I am convinced she does not like me:
why, I can't tell_. (O Charlotte!) _Nor do I think she herself has any
definite reason for this aversion_.(!) But for one thing, she cannot
understand why I do not make intimate friends of Mesdames Blanche,
Sophie and Haussé. M. Heger is wondrously influenced by Madame: and I
should not wonder if he disapproves very much of my unamiable want of
sociability. He has already given me a brief lecture on universal
_bienveillance_; and perceiving that I don't improve in consequence, I
fancy he has taken to considering me as a person to be let alone, left
to the error of her ways, and consequently he has, in a great measure,
withdrawn the light of his countenance; and I get on from day to day,
in a Robinson Crusoe like condition, very lonely. That does not signify;
in other respects I have nothing substantial to complain of, nor is even
this a cause of complaint. _Except for the loss of M. Heger's goodwill
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account