The Serapion Brethren, Vol. IIHoffmann, E. T. A. (Ernst Theodor Amadeus)
Science
The Serapion Brethren, Vol. II
Hoffmann, E. T. A. (Ernst Theodor Amadeus)
Fiction
It may be imagined what trouble Signor Pasquale had to persuade the
Pyramid Doctor and Pitichinaccio to go with him again to Musso's
theatre. Splendiano did not agree to do so until he had succeeded in
getting from a monk of the Order of St. Bernard a consecrated bag of
musk (the smell whereof neither dead men nor devils can abide), with
which he was proof against all attacks. Pitichinaccio could not resist
the promise of a box of grapes in sugar, but Signor Pasquale had to
expressly agree that he was not to wear female attire (which, he
thought, was what had brought the devils upon him), but go in his
Abbate's costume.
What Salvator had dreaded seemed thus to be about to insist on
happening, although, as he declared, his whole plot depended for
success upon Signor Pasquale and Marianna going by themselves, without
the faithful companions, to Musso's theatre.
Both he and Antonio cudgelled their brains how to keep Splendiano and
Pitichinaccio away; but there was not time enough to carry out any plan
having that for its aim, as the great stroke itself had to be struck on
the evening of the next day. But heaven--which often employs the oddest
tools in the punishment of foolish folk--interposed, in this instance,
in favour of the lovers, and so guided Michele that he gave the rein to
his natural dunderheadedness, and by that means brought about what the
skill of Salvator and Antonio was powerless to accomplish.
On that self-same night there suddenly arose, in Strada Ripetta before
Pasquale's house, such a terrible swearing, shouting, and quarrelling
that all the neighbours started from their sleep, and the Sbirri (who
had been after a murderer who took sanctuary in the Piazza di Spagna),
supposing there was another murder going on, came hurrying up with
their torches. When they, and a crowd of people attracted by the noise
who came with them, arrived on the scene of the supposed murder, what
was seen was poor little Pitichinaccio lying on the ground as if dead;
Michele belabouring the Pyramid Doctor with a frightful cudgel, and the
said Doctor in the act of falling down; whilst Signor Pasquale, picking
himself up with difficulty, drew his sword, and began furiously lunging
at Michele. All round lay fragments of shattered guitars. Several
people stopped the old gentleman's arm, or he would infallibly have run
Michele through the body. The latter (who, now that the torches had
come, saw, for the first time, who it was that he had to do with),
stood like a statue, with eyes staring out of his head. Presently He
emitted a terrific yell, tore his hair, and implored forgiveness and
mercy. Neither the Pyramid Doctor nor Pitichinaccio were seriously
hurt, but they were so stiff, and so black and blue, that they could
not move a muscle, and had to be carried home.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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