The Shadow On The Dial, and Other Essays: 1909Bierce, Ambrose
Philosophy
The Shadow On The Dial, and Other Essays: 1909
Bierce, Ambrose
Essays
It may be urged that the Congressional "eulogy" expresses in a general
way the eulogist's notion of what he would like to have somebody say
of himself when he is by death elected to the Lower House. If so, then
Heaven help him to a better taste. Meanwhile it is a patriotic duty to
prevent him from indulging at the public expense the taste that he has.
There have been a few men in Congress who could speak of the character
and services of a departed member with truth and even eloquence. One
such was Senator Vest. Of many others, the most charitable thing that
one can conscientiously say is that one would a little rather hear a
"eulogy" by them than on them. Considering that there are many kinds
of brains and only one kind of no brains, their diversity of gifts is
remarkable, but one characteristic they have in common: they are all
poets. Their efforts in the way of eulogium illustrate and illuminate
Pascal's obscure saying that poetry is a particular sadness. If not sad
themselves, they are at least the cause of sadness in others, for no
sooner do they take to their legs to remind us that life is fleeting,
and to make us glad that it is, than they burst into bloom as poets all!
Some one has said that in the contemplation of death there is something
that belittles. Perhaps that explains the transformation. Anyhow the
Congressional eulogist takes to verse as naturally as a moth to a
candle, and with about the same result to his reputation for sense.
The poetry is commonly not his own; what it violates every law of sense,
fitness, metre, rhyme and taste it is. But nine times in ten it is
some dog's-eared, shop-worn quotation from one of the "standard" bards,
usually Shakspere. There are familiar passages from that poet which
have been so often heard in "the halls of legislation" that they have
acquired an infamy which unfits them for publication in a decent family
newspaper; and Shakspere himself, reposing in Elysium on his bed of
asphodel and moly, omits them when reading his complete works to the
shades of Kit Marlowe and Ben Jonson, for their sins.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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