And she made certain resolves as to the manner in which she would do
her duty by her husband. Her sister Amelia was paramount in her own
house, ruling indeed with a moderate, endurable dominion, and ruling
much to her husband's advantage. Alexandrina feared that she would
not be allowed to rule, but she could at any rate try. She would do
all in her power to make him comfortable, and would be specially
careful not to irritate him by any insistence on her own higher rank.
She would be very meek in this respect; and if children should come
she would be as painstaking about them as though her own father had
been merely a clergyman or a lawyer. She thought also much about
poor Lilian Dale, asking herself sundry questions, with an idea of
being high-principled as to her duty in that respect. Was she wrong
in taking Mr. Crosbie away from Lilian Dale? In answer to these
questions she was able to assure herself comfortably that she was
not wrong. Mr. Crosbie would not, under any circumstances, marry
Lilian Dale. He had told her so more than once, and that in a solemn
way. She could therefore be doing no harm to Lilian Dale. If she
entertained any inner feeling that Crosbie's fault in jilting Lilian
Dale was less than it would have been had she herself not been an
earl's daughter,--that her own rank did in some degree extenuate her
lover's falseness,--she did not express it in words even to herself.
She did not get very much sympathy from her own family. "I'm afraid
he does not think much of his religious duties. I'm told that young
men of that sort seldom do," said Rosina. "I don't say you're wrong,"
said Margaretta. "By no means. Indeed I think less of it now than
I did when Amelia did the same thing. I shouldn't do it myself,
that's all." Her father told her that he supposed she knew her own
mind. Her mother, who endeavoured to comfort and in some sort to
congratulate her, nevertheless, harped constantly on the fact that
she was marrying a man without rank and without a fortune. Her
congratulations were apologetic, and her comfortings took the guise
of consolation. "Of course you won't be rich, my dear; but I really
think you'll do very well. Mr. Crosbie may be received anywhere, and
you never need be ashamed of him." By which the countess implied that
her elder married daughter was occasionally called on to be ashamed
of her husband. "I wish he could keep a carriage for you, but perhaps
that will come some day." Upon the whole Alexandrina did not repent,
and stoutly told her father that she did know her own mind.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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