Praise Hearst, from whom all blessings flow! Praise Hearst, who runs things here below. Praise them who make him manifest-- Praise Andy L. and all the rest. Praise Hearst because the world is round, Because the seas with salt abound, Because the water's always wet, And constellations rise and set. Praise Hearst because the grass is green, And pleasant flow'rs in spring are seen; Praise him for morning, night and noon. Praise him for stars and sun and moon. Praise Hearst, our nation's aim and end, Humanity's unselfish friend; And who remains, for all our debt, A modest sweet white violet. * * * We like Schubert's Unfinished Symphony, Kubla Khan, and many other unfinished things, but we have always let unfinished novels alone--unless you consider unfinished the yarn that "Q" finished for Stevenson. And so we are unable to appreciate the periodical eruptions of excitement over "The Mystery of Edwin Drood." Were we to read it, we dessay we should be as nutty as the Dickens fans. * * * Mr. Basso, second violin in the Minneapolis Orchestra, would seem to have missed his vocation by a few seats. * * * MY DEAR, YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN FRED! [From the Milwaukee Sentinel.] In this one, the orchestra became a troupe of gayly appareled ballerinas, whirling in splendid abandon, with Mr. Stock as première. * * * One lamps by the advertisements that the Fokines are to dance Beethoven's "Moonshine" sonata. The hootch-kootch, as it were. * * * OFT IN THE STILLY WISCONSIN NIGHT. Sir: California may have the most sunshine, but I'll bet Wisconsin has the most moonshine. E. C. M. * * * Did ever a presidential candidate say a few kind words for art and literature, intimate the part they play in the civilizing of a nation, and promise to further them by all means in his power, that the people should not sink deeper into the quagmire of materialism? Probably not. * * * "Hercules, when only a baby, strangled two servants," according to a bright history student. Nobody thought much about it in those days, as there were plenty to be had. * * * Absolute zero in entertainment has been achieved. A young woman recited or declaimed the imperishable Eighteenth Amendment in an Evanston church. * * * With Jedge Landis at the head of grand baseball and Mary Garden at the head of grand opera, the future of the greatest outdoor and indoor sports is temporarily assured. * * * Rome toddled before its fall. The Delectable River. I.--DOCTOR MAYHEW'S SHOP.