Ancestor worship is not peculiar to any tribe or nation. We observed last evening, on North Clark street, a crowd shaking hands in turn with an organ-grinder's monkey. * * * "In fact," says an editorial on Uncongenial Clubs, "a man may go to a club to get away from congenial spirits." True. And is there any more uncongenial club than the Human Race? The service is bad, the membership is frightfully promiscuous, and about the only place to which one can escape is the library. It is always quiet there. * * * Sign in the Black Hawk Hotel, Byron, Ill.: "If you think you are witty send your thoughts to B. L. T., care Chicago Tribune. Do not spring them on the help. It hurts efficiency." * * * AN OBSERVANT KANSAN. [From the Emporia Gazette.] The handsome clerk at the Harvey House makes this profound observation: Any girl will flirt as the train is pulling out. * * * _THE GIRL OF THE PERIOD._ _She formerly talked of the weather, The popular book, or the play; Her old line of chat Was of this thing or that In the fashions and fads of the day._ _But now she discusses eugenics, And things that a pundit perplex; She knocks you quite flat With her new line of chat, And her "What do you think about sex?"_ * * * "Are we all to shudder at the name of Rabelais and take to smelling salts?" queries an editorial colleague. "Are we to be a wholly lady-like nation?" Small danger, brother. Human nature changes imperceptibly, or not at all. The objection to most imitations of Rabelais is that they lack the unforced wit and humor of the original. * * * A picture of Dr. A. Ford Carr testing a baby provokes a frivolous reader to observe that when the babies cry the doctor probably gives them a rattle. * * * WHAT DO YOU MEAN "ALMOST"! [From the Cedar Rapids Republican.] The man who writes a certain column in Chicago can always fill two-thirds of it with quotations and contributions. But that may be called success--when they bring the stuff to you and are almost willing to pay you for printing it. * * * WE'LL TELL THE PLEIADES SO. Sir: "I'll say she is," "Don't take it so hard," "I'll tell the world." These, and other slangy explosives from our nursery, fell upon the sensitive auditory nerves of callers last evening. I am in a quandary, whether to complain to the missus or write a corrective letter to the children's school teachers, for on the square some guy ought to bawl the kids out for fair about this rough stuff--it gets my goat. J. F. B. * * * Did you think "I'll say so" was new slang? Well, it isn't. You will find it in Sterne's "Sentimental Journey." * * *