She stood up, tossed back the hair from her forehead, and shook herself
... shook off every vestige of the everyday Lilly; the Lilly subject to
fits of depression and faintheartedness; the vacillating, inanimate
Lilly.... Now she was off. She first plunged into an imitation of "La
belle Otero," and crowed and whooped so that her audience laughed till
it cried.... Then she mimicked a star of the cabarets, ... sucked her
thumb in babylike simplicity and piped, "Let me in, I say, into your
room to-day." In a comical double-bass she growled, "An ambassador
would a-wooing go." Half-hidden behind the hatstand she cooed the song
of the passionate love-pigeon, "Gurr ... gurr ... keak." Finally they
begged her to dance. At first she protested, but in vain; she had to
give in. Tables and chairs were moved out of the way, and making her
own dance-music between her teeth, she whirled madly round the room,
till half-fainting she collapsed into a corner.
The applause seemed as if it would never stop. The women devoured her
with kisses, the men stroked her arms and hair, and Richard stood
silent and pale with pride, in his Napoleonic attitude, and gnawed his
moustache ends. Dr. Salmoni, however, kept in the background, smiled a
melancholy modest smile, and looked as if he had nothing on earth to do
with what had passed. Only one brief glance of understanding, that he
threw at her like a laurel-wreath, told her that he knew for whom she
had let herself go. When the party broke up, she was still glowing with
ecstasy from head to foot.
Yes! this was the genuine intoxication, of the charms of which he had
lately spoken to her; it was like a hissing flame darting through your
heart and limbs.
It was he who helped her on with her fur coat, for Richard was engaged
in paying the bill; and while he carefully placed the sable boa round
her shoulders, he whispered close to her ear, "May I call to-morrow?"
"Yes," she said, terrified at herself; and then, in defiance of her own
cowardice, she turned brusquely on her heel and shouted back in his
face four or five times, as if in wrath, "Yes, yes, yes, yes!"
"What is the matter with her?" people asked each other.
But she laughed a short, hard laugh. What did she care for them? Was
she not once more scaling the heights?
* * * * *
The next morning all seemed like a fantastic dream. Only one fact stood
out clearly. He was coming to call!
She stretched herself in shy conceit as the applause of last night
echoed in her ears. Now he knew what she was. No dull, tame,
half-developed creature; no servile, sheep-like nature, whose fixed
horror of fate made her the voluntary slave of every convention. But,
on the contrary, a free, proud, luminous super-being, one of those
perfectly complete, maenad-like women who dance on the edge of
precipices and mock at death, even when he holds them in his clutches.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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